Too Soon

       Earlier this week I got a phone call from my cousin. His brother, my cousin Ralph, had recently been dealing with some health issues but was not at all on his way out.  And yet he was. Suddenly, after complications from a lung condition, he found himself at the end of his journey.  His family gathered and my mom and I drove to Pennsylvania to visit with him one last time, hard to believe.  Hard to believe. 

Ralph with granchildren
Ralph, I always knew you were a mountain of a man, but the magnitude of what fortified that mountain was never more clear to me than just the other day. Since I was a very small girl and on occasion when my life’s path was rocky and I needed to sort things out and to bounce my decisions off someone who would tell it to me straight, it was your number I called. You understood the Amoia (your mother? my father? ) in me like no one else. Because we moved to different states to raise our families, we didn’t see each other as much as we would have liked, but the love and laughs and commiseration were always there, just a phone call away. When we’d gather again, it was as if no time had passed. Sadly it was more often for sad times than not. Jeez, we sure pick the wrong places for family reunions, huh?
We came to see you the other day because almost unbelievably, something was bringing down the mountain. I have never been more in awe of a human being than as I witnessed you… comforting others (supposed to be the other way around!) … saying words of caring and comfort and love, still joking, still that hilarious and sarcastic sense of humor – still you in all the ways that matter. How tender you were with your young grandchildren, so much love in the room. Because of you.

Gone way too soon – You will remain in all of us, near and far, as we carry on without the mountain in the backdrop. My heart breaks for your wife,  Your brother and his family,  your children , their spouses, your beautiful grandchildren and selfishly for myself. I hope you’re not just resting in peace – I hope there was a big party thrown in your honor and you’re raising hell again with those who have gone before us – with that big laugh and some wicked stories.
Love you forever – ðŸ’”  Until we meet again –