A belated Happy Easter to you !
We got together with some of our extended family and enjoyed a conversation filled -catching up – meal together. While I am not religious, Easter represents renewal for me. We’re spending more time outdoors.. there are buds on the trees, birds hunting for good nest sites…and, I get to spoil my kids with baskets full of chocolate, a few spring clothes items and some silly fun things too. They’re grown now, but the tradition will continue because I can’t bear to give it up, truth.
I picked my father up from the nursing home and he was glad to join us. I imagine one of the hardest realities for him has been giving up his car – his independence. I had to sign him out and it felt weird . He was taken back by that simple act too. However… it is very obvious from his conversations with us and his growing relationships with the staff that he feels safe where he lives now, he is content. Huge gift for both of us. When I brought him back and he returned to his room, he sat down in his big easy chair, exhausted…and at peace. I don’t know how else to describe it. Who would think life in a nursing home would bring comfort… and yet, for some it really does. In this environment he has gained the stability, routine and even companionship that he was never able to establish for himself in his earlier life due to his choices. Now, with no choices, he has what he wouldn’t give himself before… and he is doing well. In his new life path, which he did not choose, it seems he has gained more than he lost. Ironic.
Our family lost a patriarch last week –
I grew up on Staten Island, and at 19 moved to Connecticut to live on my Aunt and Uncle’s horse farm just up the road from This Old House. I brought my adopted ancient horse with me, and lived with them for four years, helping care for their horses while attending college and finding my way to the life I’ve made here with my husband and children. The opportunity they gave me will never be forgotten.
D had conquered cancer about nine years ago, but the harsh treatment rendered him weaker and encouraged Parkinsons to bloom in his system. D was a very vibrant, very active athlete until that time.. and from there, although his spirit never once gave in, his body eventually gave out. My aunt and uncle have been a team since they were both very young – they’ve been through many changes in life together, some hardships, many joyful times. Both have lived their lives fully, and together. Their children and grandchildren gather around my Aunt now, and together they will move forward. My heart goes out to her. I have no doubt she will be OK and I know she won’t be alone. There is no way to avoid navigation through the new reality of life without my uncle, but she’s made of the stuff that will see her through and there is still a life to live. My uncle would want that for her.
Peace be with us all in this season of renewal.
