For the 25 years we’ve been married
Mike has always had a bike.
First it was a rice rocket. Yuck.
Then came the Harleys.. one after the other.
As a recreational rider, he’d take the bike for a ride mostly during the summer,
and only every so often. Sometimes with a friend or two,
sometimes with me on the back.
It made him feel a little free of all the responsibilities he carries with family and business.
I totally understand the need.
I used to enjoy tagging along on a warm summer evening..
riding down by the water with the salt and wind in my hair
or winding down a country road where old barns still stand watch over green or plowed fields.
Something has changed though.
This year it doesn’t feel right.
We took a spin on Sunday night and the entire time,
I felt vulnerable. Mike is a responsible rider and he’s got the experience
of all these years to keep us safe.
But you never know. And I felt so exposed to that pavement and the other drivers.
Yes.. things change. I just don’t think I’ll be riding behind him on that bike anymore.
Funny, last night he said this..
“You know, getting on the bike just isn’t so thrilling anymore. I used to love it. Now it’s just
another form of transportation, I might sell it”.
*sigh of relief*
You know bikes are fun I've never had one but the reason is there's so many cars out and people are stupid and don't pay attention ! It's doesnt seem worth it to me ! Hey at least he seems on the same page right ?
I loved riding on the back of motorcycles when I was young. A long bike ride from Arizona through California was great fun when I was in my 20's. I would definitely feel vulnerable now.
My hubby bought a bike soon after we married and I often rode with him. I will never forget the 4th of July that we had a softball game with friends and a keg of beer. I protested that he wasn't good to drive home, but he insisted he was fine. At home he took a long nap, and when he woke he asked "how did we get home?" That was the LAST time I rode with him and he sold it when our first child was born! Now in his 60's, he still laments the loss of his bike and wants to buy one again! I say "No way!"
hmmm. interesting how it hit you both differently.
Maybe for the best…
My husband has been riding for a few years, and I have never been on the back. He typically goes on it when I'm not around, as I tend to worry when he is gone. I swear he enjoys LOOKING for the next one, and finding a deal, more than he enjoys riding. I have no problem with him buying and selling them…it's the riding in between. I am hoping he comes to the conclusion himself that he doesn't need one.
I love my scooter Karen, but it tops out at 40 and I don't ride it on too many busy roads. There is no way you could get me on a Harley. My husband was in a terrible motorcycle accident years ago and he learned his lesson big time. I can see why you would be sighing in relief!!
We were the same way. Back when we were in our 40s we got rid of our motorcycle. But we rode ATVs for a long time after that and we loved those. We both had one and rode on our land…back on logging roads and all. I would still enjoy that! It makes me smile just to think of those fun rides! Hugs!
We always hear "people don't change", but there are some things in life when change is good. I'm thinking this is good for both of you. 🙂
xoxo
I like your new header. 🙂
Nine years ago, my husband brought home two Harleys, thinking I'd learn. No way, but we got a Road King and I took the back seat. Last weekend He got a Trek tandem for our 29th. Again, I take the back seat, but this is better.
The older I get, the more comfortable and happy I am on the back of our Harley.
Perhaps it comes with less responsibilities and obligations (read: my children are all grown up).
We sold ours, too, Karen. Then-we thought maybe we had made a mistake and borrowed one for a weekend to "see". We saw. It was time to give it up. Besides, a couple our age got killed a mile from our house slowing to turn into a park. It was time. Good luck- I still miss that feeling of "freedom" sometimes though-but it is just not worth it.
My husband and I went through the same thing 20 years ago. I very clearly remember the day when I saw the pavement whizzing past my denim legs as I rode on the back of the bike, and I wondered how my children be if we became a pair of motorcycle statistics. One too many close calls with car drivers who don't pay attention, and that was the end of our biking days. The bike sat in the garage for a year before the formal decision was made to sell it.
Right now, I'm having that conversation with myself about my Mustang. It's not time yet, but it may be soon. I will know if it is.
That is so both crazy and so cool that without speaking about it- you both felt the same way. My son quit baseball this year, and he just hasn't even looked back at it wistfully at all. Sometimes its just time to find the next new adventure 🙂 Loved the photos! I love Harley riding and haven't in years- wonder if I'd feel the same now? Hmmm…
I was raised on bikes, my Dad always had one and even bought me one. However, as I've gotten older and I hope smarter about certain things, I don't like taking those kind of chances. Life is a crap shoot, without the extra risks!
Sad…….. There comes a time that the thrills of youth become memories and good stories!!
Exactly what my friend, Warren, said about his bike. It's just a feeling, you know? And you need to heed those feelings you get in your gut.
Very cool photos, btw. Bravo on that.
I'm sitting here chuckling……
yup, we're all getting old.
I used to love flying on the back of a bike. But in this day and age of texting and blabbing while driving? I won't even ride my bicycle on any main roads anymore because it doesn't feel safe. One wrong move by another driver? I shudder to think. I totally get this post. Sad…
I was just writing today I am ah changin. Maybe our seasons of life are too. You and hubby must be in sync. Which is a good thing.
I can feel your sigh of relief from here. My BIL is a big motorcycle guy and so is my husband's son.
I know what you mean about feeling vulnerable. I am so glad my husband preferred private planes to motorcycles.
Sam
Karen, I think you and Mike are thinking the right things.
40 years ago, my younger brother (then 19)borrowed my motorcycle to go to the store, a lady didn't see him, pulled out in front of him and he was thrown 30 feet in the air and landed on his back. He broke 4 spinal vertebrae and was in a body cast for 3 months….and he was lucky…..that was it for me, I never got on a bike again!
I had taken a motorcycle safety course, and was going to teach it, like drivers ed. but never did, because my advise to all of my students would have been to sell their bikes. The biggest thing that scared me about riding was how little it took not to be seen. One of our demonstrations in class was to hold up a pencil at arms length, and see how much it hid from view….it was scary.
I was a very defensive driver, but had too many close calls where people didn't see me. That was all before cell phones and texting. Now it's much worse.
I firmly believe if he sells it, it will be the best thing for you, him and your kids…….it's none of my business, but just some comments from a good friend who used to ride, and doesn't anymore…..Tim
p.s…..Have him buy a nice convertible car for that "wind in the hair" feeling….much safer!
Maybe he sensed your feelings? We haven't been on the bike for years — life just took another turn and there's no time for it. But he'll never sell it. Lol.
I used to love to ride, and began with minibikes years ago, but like you I feel too vulnerable now, which is such a shame because there is nothing like riding on a motorcycle or in a boat! I still do the boat thing…less idiots to worry about. I agree with Kate…follow your gut!
Kat
I cannot stand motorcycles. Have had too many friends either killed or severely injured. Even my son in law's dad is lucky to be alive after and accident t-boning a Tahoe driven by an immature sixteen year old who pulled out in front of him a few years ago. He had ridden bikes all his life, but not anymore. I think we do get more fearful as we get older, or wiser.