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She’s come undone, but she’s coming back together

I’m feeling that in more ways than one. As a good blog friend has reminded me more than once as of late.. Let Go Or Be Dragged. I hear ya Stephen.. I’m listening…

Stella is also coming back together… the Mr. and I drove down to the cove this morning to soak in all the progress without all the workmen. It was clear and sunny with no whipping winds, the water was crystal clear and I swear Stella was smiling as we pulled up to admire her newfound fortitude. Let me show you a -before- and – current – situation.

I took this at waters edge.. see the bubbles? That’s how clear the water.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch.. last night the manchild invited his old HS buddies for a bonfire up on the hill. All are home from college for the holiday and I just loved hearing their giggles and chiding and noise in general as they decended upon my kitchen once again. I miss that noise.

Our Thanksgiving was a fun family affair hosted by my SIL. The kids got together for some football on the lawn and board games later on after a gracious dinner. The maple cheesecake recipe I shared with you in the previous post was the BOMB, I highly recommend the recipe. Use real maple syrup if you try it.

I picked my father up from the nursing home to join us, and although he didn’t take his jacket or hat off for the entire visit, he truly enjoyed the company. We all stayed away from political discussions because the group was mixed. Actually, a text was sent out just prior to arrival that said NO POLITICS! …. it worked.

We’re having dinner at my daughters condo tonight – her partner is an incredible cook and they have invited us for a second Thanksgiving meal. While I did not welcome the empty nester thing, there are definitely some perks.

Reading lists – I’m in full reading mode again now that the chill is in the night air and the darkness decends early. I just finished Mud Season, currently reading Girl on the Train. It’s OK, not really grabbing me. I should admit I didn’t like Gone Girl much either – the characters were just totally unlikable for me. I do want to know the mystery brewing behind Girl though, so I’ll finish it. If you’re so inclined, list some good reads you’ve enjoyed in the comments below.

Happy Weekend, All – as always, thanks for stopping by.

Karen

Blanket Season

Indeed, we were spoiled with a most beautiful Autumn. Yesterday, Winter let us know she is not far behind and I blanketed the horses to fend off the chill. She’s sprinkling flurries and whipping winds up on the hill as I type this.

The girls have a heat lamp in the coop, because I can’t stand the thought of their little combs and wattles frostbitten when the temps really dip. Not all chicken tenders (no pun intended!) believe this is necessary, but it makes me feel better.. so. Henrietta is very appreciative.

I’m supposed to be out shoveling sh*t right now, but I’m feeling under the weather today – a combination of stress over the election and it’s fallout, a cold – the first I’ve had in about 15 years, and perhaps a stomach bug last night just to kick it up a notch. Of course, fibromyalgia, not wanting to be left out, kicks it up another notch for good measure.

I keep trying to -reset- — Put the election results behind me and move on. My friends are still ranting and arguing on Facebook, even the “winners”, although we all lost in my opinion. I’m trying not to get into the fray, but it’s so damn hard when you feel so damn concerned about what all this means. I was hoping for some Presidential Behavior to arrive with the incoming President Elect, but no.. the 3 a.m. tweets continue. Doesn’t he have more important things to worry about now?? The whining continues ( Please Donald.. you reap what you sow, simple concept, google it) He’s taking liberties already with his children, with his business interests, The Draining of the Swamp didn’t happen, he’s picking from it. And I called this one months ago…. The First Lady isn’t moving into the White House…. for now. Yes I know she found a believable excuse but I don’t think for one minute she wants to live in the Big House. So another special exception will be made for his wife and one of his children. What that means for the Secret Service detail and other occupants of the Ivory Tower remains to be seen, but for sure, it’s “un-presidented”.

What’s a girl have to do to get out of her own way? Create. I’m starting a new painting, an oil of my horse underneath that glorious old pear tree (the giving tree) that still gives about 1,000 pears per season regardless of it’s almost completely hollowed out core. This is going to be tricky and will take a while, but I’m hoping it will soothe my soul. My “studio” is now my son’s bedroom – the one he vacated this past year to live with his GF. They’re doing remarkably well, by the way.. so proud of their accomplishments as they build on their education and career, and learn what living together responsibly and selflessly means. It’s a beautiful thing.

Are you getting ready for the big Thanksgiving Feast? Most years I have cooked the meal here and various family have been invited. This year my SIL is hosting and I will be bringing a few desserts.. I plan to make an apple pie and a maple cheesecake, which is new in my repertoire… because SOMEONE ELSE IS BRINGING A STORE BOUGHT PUMPKIN!! – WHAT?? GAH!!… The recipe can be found here if you’re interested. For the cheesecake, not the store bought.

An update on my father and his life at Apple Rehab- while there are things about him I will never understand or condone, I have to give him credit. He has adjusted well to nursing home living, something I didn’t think would happen. He’s made friends. He has a “coffee clutch” – I call them the rat pack, who hang out in the front hall and watch people come and go. They play cards, they order take out and have pizza delivered, they flirt with the nurses, they watch football and complain about the candidates. My dad is one of the “winners”… we don’t go there because in his previous life he was a racist and a womanizer. I can’t tolerate his fist pumping over this one and so he has learned if he doesn’t shut up I’ll walk out. Sounds harsh, right? But it is the reality.

The one area that is still a struggle is this – He is supposed to share his room with another. So far, he’s been through three room mates – He’s not very considerate, leaving the heat at greenhouse temps (uncomfortable for anyone but him) and never shutting off his TV, not even when he leaves the room for a while. His reason is he doesn’t like the inconvenience of having to turn it back on. They’ve tried talking to him about being considerate of his roommates, but ultimately they’ve had to separate them. The home has been very considerate up to this point, but there’s just so much shuffling they’re going to be willing to do. He lies to me about the reasons for the squabbles so I no longer ask. They gave me permission to -stay out of it- so that our visits can remain cordial. for this holiday I will pick him up and bring him to my SIL’s house, and bring him back home when he peters out. It’s not the ideal, but it’s what we’ve got.

Not the ideal, but it’s what we’ve got. Wash, Rinse, Repeat…

There is much to be Thankful for, tis true. I’ll be back with updates on Stella over at Once Upon a Tide soon enough.. Happy Thanksgiving! and Peace be with us all.

Facelift, Yuge and Bigly

The garage door has been replaced over at Once Upon A Tide…

I went to the cove this morning to see the progress… the plywood is fortifying the walls so we can cedar shake. If we hadn’t done that, the nails would have gone through the entire wall (no sheetrock, no insulation). The windows have been removed and will be replaced as well.

Staining the rails and posts to match the stained cedar siding… We decided if we painted all that white to match the lattice below, it would have looked very heavy.

Updated photo at 4PM from the husband….. You know.. I christened this cottage “Once Upon A Tide”.. but what keeps popping up in my head is “How Stella Got Her Groove Back”. I think her name is truly Stella, this little place. What do you think? – I’m going down to sit with Stella for a while, hopefully gain some perspective.

The water in the cove was calm today.. always thrilled to see how clear the water is and how healthy the shellfish beds. Years ago, Long Island Sound had a big polution problem and there was a big effort to “Clean Up The Sound”… Since I moved to Connecticut over 30 years ago I see a big difference in the water quality. Big improvement.

And while I haven’t quite gotten over WTF just happened last week… and because more WTF keeps happening as the new White House takes it’s shape… I have to find ways to laugh again. I’m getting a kick out of these meme’s that someone’s been putting out there.

Come for a Rain Ride to the Cove

My editorial job keeps me at the computer some days when I’d like to just get away. I’m too tempted to click on over to Facebook or CNN to see what’s -goin on- but lately, what’s goin on is toxic. Case in point this morning – You know that video I posted yesterday with Kate McKinnon singing Hallelujah? I loved it. Shared it on facebook too. My neighbor up the road thought it was offensive to Leonard Cohen, the skit bastardized the song. (what?) You know what’s offensive to Leonard Cohen, who was a Jew? The appointment of Steve Bannon. I let her know that and then I said to myself.. I said .. SELF?.. I thought you were walking away from this sh*t, weren’t ya?? Now go.

So I went, and I’m taking you with me…

The rain is coming down today, and along with it the rest of the autumn leaves…

As we get closer to the cove we drive past a preserve on the left. The proximity of the water to the road tells me whether we will be at high or low tide at the cottage. The water at times comes right up to the road, I mean inches. I’m sure the road is flooded during storms, etc. I can tell by it’s location today that it will indeed be high tide.

This little community (140-ish cottages) is private, but the only thing that would let you know this is the little guard /library/video share/seasonal notice/ hut station thing at the entrance. It’s cute. Looking for a good read? check out the shelves. Want a scolding if you’re doing something you shouldn’t be doing? Read the sign. Looking for a seasonal rent? It’s probably tacked on the board.

That’s us with the dumpster and porta potty up ahead. The water was shut off on Oct. 30th.. so….

I think we got the door color and trim (see roofline) just right.. what do you think? Next up.. new windows and the cedar shingle siding, stained to match the trim and decks.

Yep.. High tide… Notice the oyster beds are covered. In the distance you see the jetty- the nature preserve in earlier pic is just beyond.

Ah, I feel better already. If I can just stay away from the news…..

PS. I just learned how to put replies under comments.. you can teach an old dog new tricks, ya know. Thank you for joining in the conversation in previous posts… I love hearing from others, seeing perspectives from a different vantage point. Unless you’re a crank and have no empathy for others… then you just suck. Anyway… It takes courage to put yourself out there, even when we don’t agree – I thank you for doing so. Have a good day, all –

Karen

For those who are mourning after this election

*** UPDATE TO THIS POST… I had the wrong video linked.. I apologize for the error. The correct one is now below.

A friend of mine said she’s so tired of all the whiners who didn’t get what they wanted on November 9th. She continued with a hefty –get over it already, move on. She chides the protesters, how foolish! … Of course, she got what she wanted.

I’m weary of all the facebook posts, tweets and news coverage because it was and is indeed EXHAUSTING. I’m tired. I’m angry. I’m sad. There’s no question, I’m grieving. There are many reasons to grieve, in no way do I compare my grief to that of someone who has lost a loved one, I need to be clear, but all grief is real. I cried several times in recent days and I’m not a crier. That caught me by surprise. ——- the raw emotion, why has this affected me so much…

H*llary’s speech – what an example of Grace, of Dignity, of Truly Giving a Shit about the unity of this country, about what we as a nation are supposed to stand for. I wasn’t her biggest fan, but her critics want only to see her flaws and they embellish them for their own purposes. They refuse to acknowledge facts and 30 years of public service among other things. When I think of how she has been treated by the establishment and her own husband at times, I hurt for her. I’m not offended that she was ambitious… it takes ambition to get any good works done, and even the best among us have flaws. She had the courage to battle for many years the misogyny, the cruel jokes and merciless persecution by the worst of the good ole boys, what I now call members of the swamp. Amazing to put aside all the anger she must have felt at the hateful rhetoric spewed all over her during this campaign, to speak to us all for the sake of the country, asking us to unify and support the President Elect because we need him to succeed in order for us to succeed. Thank you, Hillary Clinton, for your good grace in a time of graceless behavior. – That awful morning, while half of us shook our heads in disbelief, I listened to her speak, and I cried.

Tr*mp sat down with the President – we all saw the coverage – my heart ached for a man who rose above all that hateful vitriol he faced for five years from the president elect… exuding nothing but Grace in welcoming the demagogue. What it must have taken. The words were gracious, the body language telling. How hard that must have been. I cried for him. I cried for all of us… I cried for the Grace that is leaving the white house.

For this election because of it’s nature, I voted not for a party, not solely for policy issues, not for a gender or ethnicity, but for the basic ingredient I feel every politician should be held accountable. Decency. I voted against bigotry, racism, hate speech, mysogeny, bullying, ethnic slurs, social media abuses. Yes, I’m angry that half of us were willing to forgo decency at it’s very core for whatever reasons were considered more important. …. and I’m not getting over it very soon. If you’re reading this and you’re grieving too, I hear you. We’re not whining, we’re not poor losers – as half of We The People see it, the dignity of our country was at stake and we all lose when it falls to the gutter. If you voted for Trump, I’m crying for you, too.

Thank you SNL, for hitting the nail on the head…

Now I’ve heard there was a secret chord
That David played, and it pleased the Lord
But you don’t really care for music, do you?
It goes like this
The fourth, the fifth
The minor fall, the major lift
The baffled king composing Hallelujah

I did my best, it wasn’t much
I couldn’t feel, so I tried to touch
I’ve told the truth, I didn’t come to fool you
And even though it all went wrong
I’ll stand before the Lord of Song
With nothing on my tongue but Hallelujah

We’re hedging…

M has several crews working at once down at the cottage – the main reason for the big push is WINTER IS COMING and Lord, does it get cold down at the waterfront. The other issue with renovation in that community is you’re not allowed to do it during the summer season – May through October – so as not to disturb the other residents enjoyment of their cottages. You can tell in the photos they are very close to each other and I understand the ruling. Wait till you see the progress below.. ….

We’ve had such an incredible fall, absolutely stunning here in New England. Because Once Upon A Tide is located in a cove, at times the water can be smooth as glass. Yesterday, while I continued to grieve (that’s all I’ll say today, promise) I went to the water to reboot. The leaves floating at waters edge looked like jewels in an Autumn crown…

This is our waterfront… low tide. Some of the Oyster Bed is exposed. The rock jetty you see in the background borders a nature preserve just on the other side. There is an opening not apparent in this picture and kayakers venture through it to explore the preserve. Beautiful birds are found here including blue herons, cranes, loons, cormorants, king fishers, swans, etc.

In this picture you can see the high tide mark, quite a difference is seen in just a few hours time here.

Repair of the seawall is complete… the railing will be taken down soon and replaced with something that fits the landscape now that we have a patio instead of the deck that protruded from the wall originally.

Shrubs have been planted to more clearly define our space, and frankly to help keep my dogs in it.

I’ve got several garden areas to work on next spring with an array of perennials… a few left over Russian Sage have been planted but I will fortify this area in warmer weather.

Decks and trim are in the process of being painted…

Street side, the cottage is in the middle of a huge face lift.

By last night, some of the framing had been done around the lattice…

Her shoulders are squared, chin up, she’s standing taller already, don’t ya think?

It’s a new day, all. Let’s make it a good one. As always, thanks for stopping by.

– Karen

Reflection and Moving Forward

The only way to accept the shocking results of this election and move on is to acknowledge the anger over big issues not being addressed, voices not being heard. That’s something I have never disputed and it’s why no party claims me. In my opinion the entire system is to blame and the entire system just got a big F*uck U from more than half the population.

What offends me even more than the divisive and hateful vitriol that got Trump elected is the mean juvenile hateful crap spewed all over the media and internet, and some of it came from the people I called friends. It’s one thing to dislike a public figure for their policies, their mistakes, even the lies- I have no problem reading an informed accurate piece about my choice of candidate – always open to enlightenment. The mean behavior , the schoolyard bully jokes, ….. that stuff shows me a side I can’t reconcile. Until this election I thought we as a country had evolved as a people. I thought our fiber contained more threads of decency. We’ve got a long way to go and today I am sad for all of us.

Show me a sign

I was going to write about the upcoming election, because truly I am so disgusted and I want so desperately to understand the dividing forces, the hypocrisy, the hate. I have been engaged in “conversations” on FB – what a zoo that is. I have had many heated conversations with my own spouse and the bottom line is it only got me more aggravated and nothing changed. So there’s no point in going there here. My body is feeling the tension, the anxiety, the worry, the hurt, the WTF. YES.. more than anything, the WTF. My only power is the vote, and I will rock it.. with her.

So what’s a girl to do?

Make something.

I went to Hobby Lobby, which I usually boycott because of certain practices of theirs we won’t go into here.. but I needed something only they would have. Dammit. While browsing the isles I found this whale – I love his soft, KIND expression.

I decided this was the perfect sign for the cottage at the cove. I had intended to make the entire thing myself, but hell, when the perfect platform is right there in front of you, already done – half off, well.

I just needed to paint and glue the letters. Done deal.

The guys are hammering away at the exterior.

And the seawall has gotten some repair work too…. If they took two steps back, they’d both be in the drink.

Last thing for today… I had to pick a different door color because the Mr. wants to paint the interior of the garage the same color as the doors… couldn’t justify the more powerful blue I had envisioned if it has to serve that purpose too… so this is the color scheme we’re going with – the door is Benjamin Moore Grenada Villa and the trim will be Dove White.. siding cedar shingle stained the approx. color you see here on the siding.

I’m not religious as you know if you’ve been reading here for very long, but I’m going to pray for all of us during the coming week – May our Great Country survive the horrible divide that has come between us and may we heal what has been aroused, poked and inflamed – the very worst that lies in our makeup. I’m pleading with every one of you – whatever your choice…. GO VOTE. It matters. It Matters. IT MATTERS.

– Just sayin.

Vitamin Sea

The want for a seaside cottage has always been mine. The driving force for driving for hours on end year after year in search of the perfect someplace was always me. He was a good sport and we came close to a purchase several times, but it never felt -just right. I carried a bit of guilt that we were doing the searching for yet another of my dreams. Because we aren’t the Rockefellers, a second home is a stretch, and one admittedly he pays for the most, being the major breadwinner, bringer home of the bacon, payer of the big bills, etc. etc. We have dogs and horses and chickens and rabbits because of me, and it’s me who wants the sea. I am a seahorse in another life, suits me, don’t ya think?

But since we acquired this needy little cottage, guess what I have discovered, much to my delight. Despite the fact that his work load now has an added burden, he is finding real joy, finding real peace.. in this little slice of seaside retreat. There’s a lilt in his voice and a twinkle in his eye when he talks of what we are working on there. This is job site number FIVE he is currently working on, all five juggling at the same time. Up at 4 am getting the days paperwork and schedule in order. At night it’s back at the desk making calls for the next day’s work orders. He’s a bonafide workaholic, truth. But…. when he goes down to the cottage to check on the days progress… the sunshine on his face and the salt air and the rhythmic sound of the water lapping the seawall soothe him. He allows himself to sit, to rest, to turn his face to the sun and breathe deep. Even as he’s talking on the phone to a crew member at another site, there is a calmness in his voice. It’s as if the rhythm of the sea is taken up in his heart and soul.. and it heals him as it has always healed me.

Side door deck and steps replaced….

Waterfront deck steps in, all supports under cottage replaced and spray painted black so they won’t show through the lattice… notice how much more level the lines of the house are now. I’m amazed.

The garage was full of “stuff”, some of it very old. Most was discarded or given away, but a few finds I will keep and frame to hang inside, a homage to the yesterdays here.

The exterior of the cottage is currently a battleship grey with darker grey trim. The interior of the garage indicates it used to be a pale aqua green in color. The removal of the spare key that apparently wasn’t moved to paint the garage during the aqua application reveals an original white paint.

Scissors and a pencil sharpener – the treasures I will frame. The sharpener appears to be a 1940’s model, so it’s probably been with the cottage since it’s early years, constructed in 1935.

The back porch (street side) has a new floor and soon the porch itself will be rebuilt. The cinder block you see on the right is an old chimney. The fireplace was removed years ago. This will be removed when we re-side.

A big old oak tree stands tall next to the cottage and had some worrisome branches that hung low over the roof and power line. We had it checked out by a tree expert to make sure it was sturdy in it’s roots and not about to topple over. I was pleased to learn it was healthy except for a crack beginning to form. Dead branches were removed and a support wire installed to insure its stability.

The current acorn situation over the garage roof…

I’m proud of and thankful for this man of mine. Oh, do we butt heads at times, anyone who knows us will attest to it. But I’m saying it here and will remind him tonight as he sits at the desk planning the days ahead.. that I love and appreciate him dearly for the many ways he shows his family that he loves us, truly, deeply. and yes MADLY at times because we’re being real here. I am just so happy that he’s as in love with this little place as I am. Perhaps it will coax him when the time is right to at the very least, semi-retire and revel in the little things the sea brings.

We found this little guy hiding under the house.

Deck & Patio continued and I just have to say it….

Let’s see if I can do this tactfully. No matter who you’re voting for, you’ve made up your mind a while ago, right? I think it’s true of most people. If you’re voting for the orange scream , it’s not going to matter if he spews Parseltongue through Voldemort at this point, he’s in. – F*ck the government. If you’re voting for HC, you know she doesn’t have a perfect record nor is she the warmest of characters, but you also know she’s not the evil incarnate, so you’re gonna go safe and stay the course, hoping for the changes that are needed, and F*ck the government. As for this stupid e-mail clusterf*ck, (there goes the tact) if we’re being real here, GWB lost something like 22,000 e-mails mysteriously, never to be hacked, never to be prosecuted, and he, Powell and Rice all used private servers in the same way HC did. The FBI said outright it did not appear that HC had attempted to HIDE anything. She herself is saying MAKE THE INFO PUBLIC!! Now that it’s HC on the chopping block, this is a hideous crime and some are chanting lock her up. Really? So are ya planning on locking up the others too? yeah OK. They have yet to come up with anything that was truly criminal, and yet here they go again. Against their own policies!

Whatever. If the orange scream wins, the entire government is going to get the F*ck Y*u it’s been asking for for a very long time. The people are fed up, too many things have not been addressed and gone by the wayside for far too long. The corruption, the obstructionism, the arrogance, the list goes on. No matter who you’re voting for, No intelligent human being can blame all that on one administration, one party. If HC wins, she’s going to have to do things a little differently this time around, and there’s no doubt in my mind, she will meet with the same vicious crap that has plagued her AND BO during his run. No matter what lever, chad or circle you fill in, we’re all in for a ride and none of us knows how exactly that’s going to pan out. May the force be with us all. *sigh.

Anyway… we’re making progress with the exterior of the cottage. The winds pick up and the chill sets in early down on the water, so M wants to get the outside done before it gets too cold for the crew to be comfortable out there when the ground freezes.

Back Porch, or street side… removed. For those who answered my question – it appears you are absolutely right.. the “front” of a waterfront house is the water side. The Street is the back. You learn something new every day if you’re open to it 🙂

The back deck had a lot of rot underneath, even though it looked sturdy from above. So, it’s been replaced with this… and it comes in the same color the cedar shakes will be stained when re-sided.

You may notice the roof lines of the house are much straighter now that all underneath supports have been replaced and balanced. Walking inside the cottage no longer feels like a funhouse experience.

I will plant a small seaside garden in that lower level – M is bringing in soil from the back fields of This Old House to do so. Bluestone is being laid for the patio.

I need to google plants that are happy along the water – the salt and weather can be pretty tough in the winter season.

New England shores do include sand beaches, but much of that is trucked in. Most of our shorefront consists of rocks and rock outcroppings, some sand, many shells from muscle, clam and oyster beds. Our cove happens to be the perfect environment for them so they are found in abundance. We have a very small “beachfront” in front of the cottage, completely covered during high tide. There are many shells to be found because the Sound protects us from the worst of the Atlantic Ocean weather and the waves that make it to shore have traveled some distance in shallower waters, making them pretty tame before they hit our shoreline shells. Walking into the water, you have to have water shoes to protect from stepping on any of these….

My dear blog and birthday buddy Sally C. picked a lovely shade of blue for the doors of -Once Upon A Tide- It’s called Southern Belle #819 – Perfect, as she’s a southern belle herself.

Another that caught my attention is Old Navy…

Once the siding is up I’ll have a better idea of the right shade. Opinions? Leave em!

Have a good day all, and as always, thanks for stopping by.

Karen