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Martha’s Vineyard 2018

The Mr. and I took a three day hiatus to the island of Martha’s Vineyard – just a 2.5 hour drive and then 45 minute ferry ride is all it takes to get to one of my favorite places on earth. It’s also one of the favorite places on earth of some 100, 000 other people. So, while there’s still a lot of wild, rugged, natural beauty on island and you can get away from it all if you go to the right places, it’s also extremely peopley in summer months. We found a mid-week trip is easier to navigate. There are no traffic lights on island and no fast food joints (imagine that! ) … and people manage to be polite to one another most of the time, and survive on decent food.

I love the excited feeling of pulling up to the ferry docks, driving on to the Ferry and sitting on the deck as we make the brief crossing to the island. Like a kid again, and I wish for all of you that you get that giddy feeling now and then, it’s good for the soul.

This is the Island Home ferry – in this photo we’ve just driven off it (cars in bottom level) and are on the beach nextdoor at the famous Black Dog restaurant, waiting for the lunch at noon opening. We’ve made this a tradition, and a better fish and chips dish you’ll be hardpressed to find.

Of the six towns on the island, Edgartown is our favorite place to stay. The Harborside Inn is our go to for short stays – right on the water, amidst all the quaint shops and restaurants, it’s a convenient location in a great walking neighborhood. The flowers absolutely everywhere are stunning… there is one landscape company on island in charge of all the planters, and most early mornings you’ll see the crews out there deadheading and watering, sweeping up debri.

In July the hydrangea, roses and daylilies are in full bloom – just glorious.

I noticed a white poodle is the accessory most yacht owners carry on and off boat with them. Many of those poodles have strollers if their owner is strolling around town. The poodle on this boat has a very good life, dining nightly with his/her owners on the upper deck, strolling up main street in the cool morning air, while the crew hoses the decks and squeegees the windows.

Flowers and american flags everywhere… the island patriotism is clear and present.

Below is a giant Linden tree – this photo does not do it’s size justice –

Edgartown Light – a favorite spot….

So photogenic, a great place to catch the morning sunrise or

evening breezes after a hearty meal.

And hearty meals were aplenty (ahem)

Katama airfield – the Right Fork Diner – fantastic, healthy choice foods…

If you’re on island, I highly recommend the experience.

The farm institute is just down the road..

We made our traditional trek through…

admiring the gardens and fields full of cows.

There are many beaches around the island – our favorites are the kid friendly

State beach that also includes the Jaws Bridge.. .

(I made the jump in my 51st year)

Gay Head, Moshup Beach (Aquinnah) … which we didn’t visit this year..

And South Beach, which can be wild at times…

The water here in the Atlantic Ocean is so clean and powerful. The hues are navy and sea blue-green. So refreshing ,too.

Funny thing – If you’re a jeeper you know all about the Jeep wave (or peace sign). Most jeepers are wavers. I’m a waver myself – I believe in upholding the tradition – which started when the original jeepers – GP-ers (general purpose vehicle) army folk used these vehicles in their operations. When they passed each other, they waved as a sign of camaraderie. For whatever the reason, on Martha’s Vineyard, no one waves. I mean NO ONE. Yet once you cross the ferry back to the mainland, the waves begin again. So bizarre. I thought about it. And I’ve come up with this. There are many many Jeeps available for rent on the island because you can take them offroading on some of the beaches and tourists think that’s way cool. Perhaps the tourists who don’t normally drive a Jeep aren’t aware of the Jeep tradition, and so they don’t wave or peace out. Perhaps the real jeepers who live on island have gotten so tired of being snubbed, they don’t bother anymore.

I waved anyway… I think jeep rental places should put a sign on the dash explaining the tradition. Some thingsshould be upheld, ya know?

My Jeep still carries the sand from our adventures this week, I think I’ll leave it there.

Heading home on the Governor… a smaller freight ferry.

Too Soon

Earlier this week I got a phone call from my cousin. His brother, my cousin Ralph, had recently been dealing with some health issues but was not at all on his way out. And yet he was. Suddenly, after complications from a lung condition, he found himself at the end of his journey. His family gathered and my mom and I drove to Pennsylvania to visit with him one last time, hard to believe. Hard to believe.

Ralph with granchildren

Ralph, I always knew you were a mountain of a man, but the magnitude of what fortified that mountain was never more clear to me than just the other day. Since I was a very small girl and on occasion when my life’s path was rocky and I needed to sort things out and to bounce my decisions off someone who would tell it to me straight, it was your number I called. You understood the Amoia (your mother? my father? ) in me like no one else. Because we moved to different states to raise our families, we didn’t see each other as much as we would have liked, but the love and laughs and commiseration were always there, just a phone call away. When we’d gather again, it was as if no time had passed. Sadly it was more often for sad times than not. Jeez, we sure pick the wrong places for family reunions, huh?

We came to see you the other day because almost unbelievably, something was bringing down the mountain. I have never been more in awe of a human being than as I witnessed you… comforting others (supposed to be the other way around!) … saying words of caring and comfort and love, still joking, still that hilarious and sarcastic sense of humor – still you in all the ways that matter. How tender you were with your young grandchildren, so much love in the room. Because of you.

Gone way too soon – You will remain in all of us, near and far, as we carry on without the mountain in the backdrop. My heart breaks for your wife, Your brother and his family, your children , their spouses, your beautiful grandchildren and selfishly for myself. I hope you’re not just resting in peace – I hope there was a big party thrown in your honor and you’re raising hell again with those who have gone before us – with that big laugh and some wicked stories.

Love you forever –

💔 Until we meet again –

Breathe

The humidity finally broke after a good rain storm and we have absolutely perfect weather right now. The weekend was full of the bluest skies, sun and surf at the cottage as we all took a deep breath and exhaled into the loveliness. Our lives are busy – the youngsters just beginning the building of their adult lives with budding careers and relationships, the prospect of their own homes in the near future, families, etc… and the Mr. and I continue with the care of our farm, the cottage, the family business, my editorial job and all the responsibilities that go along with. Taking time to smell the roses is so necessary and often overlooked.

Don’t miss out – take the time. No one ever lies on their death bed saying “I sure wish I hadn’t taken that trip to Bermuda, I sure wish I had spent more time fretting, Jeez, had I only dusted and vacuumed just a few hours more, I sure wish I hadn’t spent so much time with my children, my grands, my passion.

Whatever inspires you, whatever brings you happiness – do more of THAT.

I managed to get the big guy out on the water yesterday and he actually sat down and relaxed in the shade for a few hours, too. Must have been a blue moon last night, I forgot to look.

Our cove has two very different sides. Our side is a colony of small seasonal cottages that were established in and around 1930-ish. In the picture below you see what it looks like from the water.

Then there’s the end of the cove that nestles into a nature refuge just after the stone jetty – with a few reasonable year round houses on the end. (seen below).

Across the cove on the other side are some much larger homes, one of which has been in the construction phase for the last five or so years. My husband jokes that they pay the high taxes but we have the best view. They look over at us, we look over at…. well.. this….

Can you imagine rambling around in that house? And it’s quite possibly just a summer retreat for whomever is building it. Remarkable construction – note the stone tier at the bottom with wood shutter windows, just amazing.

The Giant Pink Flamingo still sits out in the cove, occasionally needing an air refill once it appears he’s taking a drink. Some people are annoyed by his appearance, I think he ads character. I’m not bold enough to bring one to the cove myself, our float is standard issue. My daisies are so happy, must be the salt air and sun.

Here in New England, Tiger lilies line the roads in early July – it’s truly a beautiful sight. These are my husband’s favorite flower, so I’ve planted daylilies on the farm and at Stella by the Sea, seen here.

Today I plan to catch up on laundry and dusting and vacuuming here at the house, and I’ll pick fresh basil from the garden to make pesto for dinner. I might even make the cake I’m going to share with you below , click on the title for the recipe – although we’re both trying to get serious about our weight loss goals so I really.. really shouldn’t. (I hear you, Hilary, from all the way over here). 🙂

CARROT CAKE

ps.. I hate when that term is used “To Die for”…

no cake is worth dying for.. just sayin.

I hope you’re having a good day, wherever you are – Don’t forget to smell the roses, eat the cake, stick your toes in the water at the beach, jump in the pool, run under the sprinkler, pick the flowers and set them in a vase just for you. Next time you wash the sheets for your bedding, hang them outside in the sunshine to dry . Put your quilt out there too – the fresh outdoor scent is intoxicating, lulls one to sleep.

Till soon, friends – Thank you for stopping by.

Hot

It’s been unGodly hot over here in New England for the past four or five days. My poor guys have been haying in the miserable heat and humidity – you’ve probably heard the old saying – Make hay while the sun shines. What that means is – you need a series of at least three or four dry sunny days strung together to make hay – it needs to be fairly dry when you cut it.. then it needs to lay down in rows and dry a bit – then you fluff it to air it out and dry some more… then it’s baled and picked up off the field and stored in the big barns. All that dryness is important, as you don’t want a wet bale of hay, which will mold up (not feedable) and possibly cause a fire in your loft if you’re not careful how you stack it. So… we had the string of dry days and the hay needed cutting. It had already been held off due to rains, etc. You can’t stop the process just because it’s too darn hot.

When the guys were not haying, they sure as hell didn’t want to sit out in the heat, so we decided not to have a big fourth celebration with extended family at the shore. Stella (our little seaside cottage) does not have A/C and some are squeamish about taking a dip in the cove to cool off. My husband has learned there are indeed eels out there somewhere – and that was pretty much it for him.

I did go down there in the late afternoon to water flowers, vacuum, and we eventually had dinner when mom and my daughter and husband showed up (he was there for all of about an hour before the humidity got to him). My son and his posse showed up later on before the fireworks display that is put on for islanders out on the point – and they say it was spectacular. In lieu of fireworks, I headed back home to tend horses , chickens and dogs here on the farm, all of whom where not thrilled with the bangs and booms happening out yonder.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch… my gardens are happy – weedy, but happy. My first harvest are these dragon tongue beans. You can pick them at this stage and treat them like you would a string bean, or let them plump up and shell the beans that grow in the pod, use them in recipes like succotash.

Tomatoes just starting to appear – we had a slow start with the wishy washy spring.

I try to keep my vegetable garden organic – over the winter I put some rabbit manure in the soil and blended it in well. I also use this product placed around the drip line of the plant a few times during the growing season.

I’m not much of a drinker but there are a few drinks when served at the right time, well they hit the spot. My sister-in-law served this in a punch bowl and plastic glasses at her son’s graduation pool party last weekend. It’s easy to throw together and guests love it. Put a slice of orange floating in each glass when serving.

Wine Spritzer –

1 large bottle of pino grigio (which I usually don’t like)
1 large bottle of polar orange dry soda
orange wedges

Equal parts of each.

*not my image

Till soon, friends –

Invasion of the Giant Pink Flamingo

We’ve been spending a significant amount of time down at the shore – cottage life has been a welcome reprieve from our hectic work life and farm chores. Heading down there at the end of the day to cool off in the water or on the deck for a meal with the gathering family, or to hop in the kayaks on a quiet morning… truly feels like we are AWAY from it all, on a little vacation. Making the decision to buy a small place not far from our home as opposed to several hours or more “away” turned out to be an excellent decision for our clan. We’re getting far more use out of it so close by than we would have if there were a long drive or flight involved. And – the bonus is friends and family are nearby and can join us easily as well.

The dogs are with us more often than not –

and while Frazier swims and has accompanied me on the kayak…

Sally is still unsure. However, she now ventures to water’s edge –

Yesterday she stretched her little stubby legs in the surf

(all of two inched deep) to reach for

a piece of snow cone my son offered up.

Progress.

The blue steps maybe stand out a bit, but their gritty texture works perfectly

to eliminate slippery stairs.

*Boat Bottom Paint Plus Sand mixed in*

And.. I’ve described this before but it always amazes me –

most of the pictures in this post are taken at low tide.

At high tide, just a few hours later, the water is up over the blue steps

– a difference of about six feet.

This succulent-like type plant grows prolifically on our seawall – anyone know what it is? It now has white flowers and is just beautiful.

The boys have been clamming – A little info – Did you know you should never clam right after a rain storm? The storm kicks up all the muck and pollution and the clams are busy filtering it out right after the storm. So they’re “full of it”… and you don’t want to eat a mucky clam.

Our new float (bottom right in picture) is holding up well so far, even with a make-shift patch to the hole we put in it trying to heave it over the cedar fence sea wall.

Do you see that little pink thing off in the distance?

It’s actually HUGE! Remember the Stay Puff Marshmallow man in Ghostbusters?

That’s what it reminds me of.

Our neighbor a few cottages down the way installed it for his kids.

Here it is in an ad – to give you an idea of the size. Apparently they are all the rage this year in lakes, ponds, rivers and coves like ours. Sams Club, among other places, sells them for around $150. Probably real fun for a party, but I doubt they last long. I’ll let you know how long Pinky lasts in our cove.

And if a giant flamingo doesn’t float your boat, perhaps a rainbow pegasus Unicorn will!

Have a safe and happy fourth of July celebration – We’ve got a heat and humidity wave going here in New England – Perfect time to have a float in the ocean.

Who deserves a place at the table

I know it… didn’t I just say I was putting down the negative “stuff” and leaving it to sit on the side of the curb in order to lead a more stress-free life? I’m gonna do that, truly I am. I’m already doing it much better than I was, at least. Sorta.

But this article written by an essayist for The New Yorker? … this was so spot on, I want to share it everywhere I can. You know that little issue S*rah S*nders had while dining out at a restaurant recently? Well, as is typical in today’s political climate.. you’re either cheering the restaurant folks on, or you’re saying they should be ashamed. Personally I’m buying a gift certificate online to their restaurant all those miles away.

Of course, if you’re saying they should be ashamed… I hope you said the same for the Baker who wouldn’t sell a cake to a gay couple. And the Supreme Court for ruling that’s OK. And to the folks who turned Joe Biden away because they just don’t believe in the same things he does. The list goes ON…

Normally my reaction to this story would be, WOW, just because you don’t agree on a political level doesn’t give you permission to turn that person away at your place of business. Actually you can do whatever you choose in your own space but it’s gonna have consequences. Talk about prejudice… and aren’t we better than that?

However.. in this particular situation… I applaud it. There’s just so much turning the other cheek I can tolerate. This administration flies int he face of any civility, rationale, decency. So I just can’t find it in me to feel badly when they reap what they sow.

And here’s why….

“someone who has decided to make it her public role to extend, with a blizzard of falsehoods, the words of a pathological liar, and to support, with pretended piety, the acts of a public person of unparalleled personal cruelty—well, that person has asked us in advance to exclude her from our common meal. You cannot spit in the plates and then demand your dinner. The best way to receive civility at night is to not assault it all day long. It’s the simple wisdom of the table.”-Adam Gopnik

If you’re interested… the complete article HERE. .

Enough Said.

Vitamin Sea

If your head isn’t spinning yet from all the vitriol and ridiculousness and continuing bullshittery that is our current situation in these Un-United States (how did we get to this – I’ll say it one more time, We Are Better Than This… oh please let us find our way to a better place, and soon, all of us)….. then you come from some sturdy stock. My fibromyalgia has been in flare in recent weeks and I’m pretty sure it’s because I’m getting far too worked up over things I cannot change. Truly I need to just set it down and walk away from it – we’ve all heard the serenity prayer, right?…

This version even better –

Fat chance unknotting knickers, but.. baby steps. So this weekend we made a concerted effort to stay the hell away from the headlines and just enjoy what’s around us – here on the farm, down at the cottage and a little lunch date excursion to the seaside town of Stonington, CT – Staying off topic is no easy feat, as the Mr. and I are polar opposites on the political spectrum. Not in all things, but Tr*mp and his rhetoric make the differences seem as wide as the Grand Canyon’s divides.

Anyway!… The Dog Watch Cafe – I’ve written about it before – if you’re in CT or driving through – it’s a lovely waterfront cafe run and staffed by friendly people with a delicious menu. Best fish & chips we’ve ever had, but there’s so much more to their fare. Have you ever heard of short rib and onion stuffed ravioli? Me either – and it was delish! And just look at all those flowers….

New to me – these paint splattered petunias. Not sure what their real name is but they’re beautiful –

The town itself is lovely – all sea captains homes, lovely cottages, row houses, and some old huge homes and buildings made into condo complexes that are just gorgeous…

The peach roses and purple clematis at this cottage were stunning – the picture doesn’t do them justice.

Note the Little Free Library on the bottom right of this photo… there were several around town, a concept I absolutely love. Reinforces what is good in people. Encourages reading, knowledge, kindness.

This brick building with slate roof is much larger than it looks in this picture, stretching down to the water behind it, converted into beautiful condos (OMG the prices though) . Click HERE for a listing available right now…

Below is the Cavalry Church, built in the 1800’s. I’m not religious – but in doing a little research on the impressive stone building, I came across their message – This is the type of message I think all religions and worshippers should embody. Unfortunately it’s not always the case.

Welcome to Calvary Church, Stonington–we hope you will come visit us in our “Church by the Sea.” We are a caring community of faith seeking to share the love of God in our life together with one another, and in our support and care for those in need in the world around us. All are welcome here. Calvary is made up of members young and old, with many new to this community of faith–“whoever you are, from wherever you have come, you are welcome here.”

We found a little seaside park that is also a preserve with walking paths and benches. They’ve installed some beautiful native flowers, bird and butterfly habitats – this split rail fence adorned with some beautiful vine art by a neighbor of the preserve – the vine pattern goes for at least 10 lengths of fence.

Mom had a visit from three of her long time friends – I call them The Golden Girls. Their long standing friendship of many years and their kindnesses to each other and our family is inspirational. Here they are, visiting Stella by the Sea – and I’m so grateful they got to “sea” her. Her doors are always open should they decide to stay for a spell.

It’s a glorious morning here on the farm – this photo taken an hour ago as the sun rose. The three amigos, all getting on in years, living a good retirement life. I wish the same for all of us.

Miss Sally, one of my two southern rescue Georgia peaches, is learning to like our rides in the Jeep when we go to the cottage. As long as I let her stand on the arm rest where she can lean in and drool all over my shoulder, she’s learned that every little thing is gonna be OK. Sometimes if we’re paying attention, we can learn a thing or two from our animals, don’t ya know. This isn’t lost on me…

Have a good day, all – and thank you for stopping by.

Yes, I do care

I am so tired of all the in-your-face bullshit. Truly- what has happened to this country? For the First Lady of the United States to purposely wear a cheap shot jacket that says I don’t Really care, Do U? … at any time! Let alone when she’s heading out to visit children in a holding center- is thoroughly disgusting. My God- This act was intentional and obnoxious- there is no other way to see it. Anyone who condones this new norm- this *fuck decency and *fuck truth- is selling us all out. I don’t care what your political affiliation or stance on issues- this goes beyond that.

Such a bizarre allegiance, We are better than this. We are better than this.

The One Without A Post Title…

.. because sometimes it just doesn’t come to you. And this one’s a real rambler – Got coffee?

We had a wonderful Father’s Day down at the cottage. My guy hardly ever takes a day off. His work ethic is why we have the nice things we have, but as I say often and more frequently lately…. what good is all that hard work/effort if you don’t get to enjoy it? I’m happy to report the Mr. spent most of the day relaxing at the shore, a much needed reprieve and reward for the most dedicated and loving father I could have ever asked for for my children.

When we pull around that corner onto our cottage road, it’s like taking a deep cleansing breath.

Last week I painted the steps that go down into the water. Throughout the summer they get coated with algae, etc. and become very slippery. I scrubbed them with baking soda and that helped, but it had to be done regularly and it was just one more thing to do. A neighbor a few cottages down used boat bottom paint with sand mixed in to paint his steps. The result is a sandpapery surface, non-slip. So, I bought a gallon of the stuff – ($150!!??) and painted the steps – the blue is a bit outlandish – but there aren’t many choices in boat bottom paint colors. It works like a charm.

Then.. on Sunday my son blew up the inflatable four person raft and I am proud to report I dropped my first anchor – yes I did. I waded out there with anchor, chain, float thing and ropes, sunk it good in the muck… kicked another anchor in the process… ick…. (the cove is an anchor graveyard) … and we proceeded to pop the float as we pulled it over the cedar railing. *sigh. Stuck some tape on it…. and tested it out…

The tape held and I went back out there yesterday with a pool patch kit – hopefully that will be that. I’ll keep you posted.

As for my own father on Father’s Day – my sister came to visit and took him out to lunch, so I was relieved of duty and yes, that sounds as awful to me as it probably does to you. I’ll stop by today with his gift, and bring him anything he needs. It will always feel like a chore in some ways, and that’s not an easy truth for me to admit, but it is what it is. He is not an evil person in any way – he’s just devoid of the type of normal emotions or actions or whatever it is I’m searching for that one would want to have with a parent. If you look up the term narcissist, that’ him in a nutshell. Being a devoted daughter to a narcissist father is something I don’t describe well and it doesn’t come naturally, in fact I’m still coming to terms with the feelings that accompany it but at least there is far less anger now. That’s good for my own health, never mind his.

So, on Father’s Day I reveled in time spent with my guy and our children and my mom – whom has in some ways been both parents for my sister and I and grandparent to my children.

Let me just put some high praise here for her mean, clean, refreshing, rejuvenating summer elixir of a gin and tonic…

On the better health front… I continue the light weight training, walking, kayaking, and attempts at better food choices. I say “attempts” because I still cheat with pizza or a cupcake but I’m getting better at it, dropping some weight and toning up. Don’t ever give in just because you’re not perfect. No one is perfect, no one gets it’s right 100 percent of the time. FUCK PERFECT – am I clear? I’m going to share with you a photo of my 61 year old friend, a personal trainer who is brutally honest in her own trials and tribulations and I think she gets it absolutely right on aging well and being kind to yourself – and NEVER GIVING UP.

Yep – this is Joey at 61, pretty amazing – not claiming perfection, not a care free life – she’s had her share of woes and tended agining and ill parents , raised three kids and mended a sick child and husband and worries about finances and health and suffers injuries and and and… …

Her words on a recent FB post – “Coming up on the end of my 61st year (for those not in the know, your birthday makes the end of a year not the beginning) meaning I’ll be 61 but in my 62nd year of life. I continue to persist in the fight against aging with the biggest tool in the box – strength training. Add a few short cardio bursts and a restorative class like stretch or yoga each week and you’ve done your best. Never give up!” Another Joey gem – “I think people get unhappy with progress and give up, but it’s a disservice to their future health and mobility, hence deterioration. KEEP MOVING.

So yeah.. we can all find excuses. And sometimes – especially with fibromyalgia pain! … it just doesn’t feel awesome to keep moving – but we must. Life and the effort we have to put into it is worth every extra step taken – Just do it.

Have a good week, all – sharing a NOT GOOD FOR YOU pie recipe, because hey I already told you I ain’t shooting for perfection and what says Summer is Coming 💦🍈 better than a Lemonade Pie, I ask you….

*not my picture or recipe – recipe link below…

Lemonade Pie

Have a good week, all –

Little Gems with big impact

With summer just around the corner, gardening on the farm and that little bit I do at the cottage by the sea is in full swing.

Mowing happens weekly, weeding happens almost daily – and here’s what I discovered about that… It’s much easier to take a four prong rake and simply claw through the soil in a garden regularly than bend over and hand pick out weeds now and then. I suck at the hand picking, because I get lazy about it and it gets, well.. out of hand. The frequent raking is so much easier. And the plants love the “aired out” soil.

As I do that little chore I remember how I learned this simple technique – wise words of an old farmer friend, Louie. He was a master gardener, and he kept his secrets close to the vest. Now and then he’d toss us a gem. One of those was… “you like to breathe, don’t you? Well… so do the plants.” 79 year old Louie passed years ago, suddenly, out in his garden. A sad day. A post on the old gardener, HERE.

Living on a farm, but not having grown up on one… takes work, mistakes happen, and a readjustment of the sails is needed, frequently. We’ve had a small horse farm for 30 years – but only for the last 8 have we lived here at This Old House among fields of hay. It had pretty much gone to the weeds when we acquired the property – How many of you knew that growing hay isn’t as simple as letting the grass get really really long and then cutting it? (we didn’t). Indeed.. there is a whole science to growing good feed hay and even mulch hay or cow feed hay (which has different requirements than horse hay) – from the type of seed you plant, to the ridding of unwanted and even toxic weeds, to the amount of sun and rain available that season, to the number of DRY days strung together so you can cut it at the right time, toss it, let it dry, toss it again, and get it baled up and off the fields before the rain comes. Then there’s the baling or rolling.

We’ve just started our first cutting – a little late due to the number of rainy and cold days we’ve had. What we notice this year is we added in too much clover in a few sections of some of the fields… Clover molds up easily in hay bales – and mold in a hay bale means you throw it out instead of feeding it. Cows and their multiple stomachs have more tolerance for crap hay than horses do, but with horses you don’t want colic (bad stomach ache that can turn deadly) … so you throw out any bales that are iffy. That costs money.

You learn as you grow.

Speaking of learning – on the better health front, I’ve discovered having lived with fibromyalgia for a while now, two things are very important to anyone living with chronic pain.

First – despite the pain you feel daily, KEEP MOVING. Unless of course you’re actually injuring yourself more. (your doctor can direct you) It really does help you feel better and keeps you mobile. My cousin has a severe form of arthritis, has since he was very young. He gets regular IV infusions of a strong drug that helps him keep going. And keep going he does – having just completed a 70 mile mountain bike ride. He is my hero. As for me, I’ve been light weight training out in the gym, hiking with the dogs, kayaking occasionally and walking/running on the tread mill when the hiking is hindered by weather or heat.

Secondly – what you put in your mouth matters. Besides the increased exercise I’ve also been trying to eat better – I know after several attempts over the years to conform to certain diets, I’m just not gonna stick to it. What I can do is be more conscientious about what I put in my mouth. It really and truly is all about what you put in your mouth. The icing is the exercise but it all starts with consumption.

Something else I feel very strongly about – A good way to bring more joy to your own life, to feel a sense of accomplishment, for better mental health and a connection to your community, a connection to people in general, and a way to focus on the positive aspects of life instead of being dragged down into the swamp muck that also exists – is to be a part of the good works going on out there. Volunteer in whatever capacity you are able – don’t ever doubt that even the smallest outreaches have value. Every drop in the ocean contributes to that ocean.

I was recently the recipient of the Melvin Jones Fellow Award given by the Lions Club International in our community for my humanitarian contributions in our little town. What an inspirational evening it was, with my family in attendance. To be among like minded people who are so giving of themselves, so caring and motivated to make change for the better in our community and in society itself is uplifting. It makes the other not so pleasant “stuff” of life seem not so imposing, looming, dooming. This doesn’t mean you have to commit to joining a club, either – I am not a Lion.

Some easy ideas – Got grain bags? Collect the discarded ones and give them to someone who recycles them into tote bags. Recycling is an awesome thing to do for our environment. Got stuff you don’t need or wear anymore? Give to the local Salvation Army or Good Will. Volunteer at the local dog shelter once a week – walk a dog, get in your exercise- win win. Love books? Got a volunteer local library? Take a shift. Donate Blood. Like to knit? Make hats for the homeless, make lap blankets for those who live in a local nursing home. Bake for the church events, the fire house events. Join the walks at the Relay for Life events held around the nation. It’s awesome if you’re financially well off enough that you can give monetary donations to causes you believe in, but that doesn’t have to be the case. Your time, your caring contributions are just as valuable.

When I saw this picture after the event I said – Jeez, Karen – go get a haircut. And so I did.

Side note: The sharing of these pics is not intended to imply that I believe I’m – all that- in any way. But I have learned to appreciate all that is good about me, instead of the laser focus I used to have on all that is not perfect. What a perfect waste of time. If you’re doing that to you, stop the nonsense. Take stock of your strengths and nourish them. Encourage the art of looking for the good, in you and in others. The ripple effect, ya know – that drop in the ocean? yeah.

So about that hair cut – Another tip that was passed along to me and I’ll share with you. I’m not one to fuss a heck of a lot with the aging experience or make up and hair. I’m hoping like everyone else that I stick around for along while and age gracefully and naturally. I love LOOONG hair, but for most of us it’s not particularly flattering to just let it grow out and hang there, drab and without decent shape. That ages us. I’m lazy about going to the hairdresser, admittedly. There’s no doubt, though, when I get in there and tell them to lift me up, indeed they do. So take care of yourself in the little ways that help us appreciate who we are and what we have. It matters.

A shout out to my niece, who graduated from Uconn… and landed a job in their finance department! Yesterday the family gathered at The Mansion at Bald Hill in Woodstock, CT to celebrate her accomplishment and future success –

Thanks for stopping by –