Village People

 My grandmother did it, my Aunt Virginia did it,  my mother sort of does it, and my sister’s husband does it too (lucky her).  This year me and the kid did it and it didn’t turn out half bad.

Now if this idea came to your mind instantly as you saw the blog post….

well then you’re atleast as old as me.
Now go ahead,  knock these guys all you want..
but they knew how to entertain!
The Proof? ….
 I’m willing to bet you can sing along to more than one of their songs
and you’ve probably done the YMCA full body sign language more than once. 
Am I right or am I right? 
You at least tried it in the privacy of your own room, didn’t ya.
ANYWAY… that’s not what I’m posting about.
Snow Village, Department 56 in particular.
Here’s a peek at ours…

And if anyone knows where I might be able to find the
retired Village greenhouse, let me know.

It’s illuminating

 Something about them brings out the inner child in us all,
don’t you think?
 I don’t care what kind of a crappy mood you might be in
and it doesn’t matter the reason… 
If you’re out on a winters eve and you come across
a holiday light display, most often your spirits are lifted.
 Like the moment when Kris Kringle hands the Winter Warlock
 a toy choo choo, melting the ice around his heart…. 
..or when Linus wraps his beloved blanket around Charlie Browns
sad little tree and friends who shunned him earlier
gather round to sing.
The tree (and Charlie) flourishes in this act of love.
When I see a light display or holiday decorations,
I think of the people who live inside the house.
Clearly, such an outward expression of joy means
 there is joy within, and it’s meant to be shared.
When there is no sign of celebration,
 no wreath on the door or holiday lights or candles
 in the window, I get the feeling there is sadness.
Now THESE folks must be oozing  joy….(or booze, could be that)

This is my favorite…
I’de love to recreate it but can you imagine the work?
The expense! 
My grandmother had a white christmas tree for years.
Sometimes it was decorated with all red ornaments
 and tinsel and poinsettia
and once  it was an ocean of blue.
Sounds tacky but let me tell you…
it was beautiful.
These trees aren’t exactly traditional, but they are extraordinary.
If I could only find those STARS….
 Today we’re planning what kind of joy we’ll be spreading around outside
 This Old House.
At the moment you can’t appreciate the irony of that statement
 because you’re not here.  
The teen and I are setting up the snow village.
This post is my coffee break, because I needed one badly.
 Apparently I have forgotten everything I ever knew
and he has found what I must have dropped on the floor
and multiplied it by all the smarts any adult has ever accumulated.
 Quick, ask him something, whatever it is,
while he still knows everything! 
Just for gawds sake don’t give your own opinion
 because I’ll warn you now
 you’re already wrong.
 I’m  off  to the hardware store
 to order 10,000 more sets of lights,
cause that’s what it’s gonna take.
*sigh*
  

Do you see what I see?

I’m halfway to the finish line with my newest project. These shoes are part of it and they represent something. I’m hoping it’s obvious when it’s done.  Does anyone see it yet?

Question:  When are two boys most likely to volunteer
 without being asked
 to CLEAN something without protest and procrastination?

 Answer:
When it’s precisely two years before they’ll have their license,
the object to be cleaned has a loud exhaust system,
 four wheels and an ignition 
and they get to pull it out into the driveway to do so.
Go figure.

You Can’t Go Home Again

 I visit Staten Island once a year to see members of our family who still call it home.  Every trip down there brings sadness to my heart, for it is not the island of my youth. I blame the city of New York for poor zoning regulations and a disregard for preservation of history.  It comes down to the all mighty dollar and a big dose of corruption, I suppose.
   The island was once hailed as a rural respite from the hectic pulse of the big city.  There are still some beautiful areas, like the old sea captains homes of Sailors Snug Harbor and Clove Lake Park.  Historic Richmond Town is a living history village and museum complex not unlike Sturbridge in Massachusetts, and as far as I can tell, the greenbelt is still “green”.  It’s also considered an affordable community for people who fortify the city workforce, although I am shocked at the real estate listing prices.  

Sailors Snug Harbor
Also known as Snug Harbor Cultural Center and Botanical Garden or referenced informally as Snug Harbor, is a collection of architecturally significant 19th century buildings set in a park located along the Kill Van Kull on the north shore of Staten Island in New York City. It was once a home for aged sailors and is now a 83-acre (340,000 m2) city park. Some of the buildings and the grounds are used by arts organizations under the umbrella of the Snug Harbor Cultural Center and Botanical Garden.

  Unfortunately, in the 25 years that I have been “off-island”,  it’s rapidly become a congested hub of  traffic, pollution (both air and ground) overcrowding of housing – duplex after fourplex after sixplex of apartment and condo units with nary a hint of  appealing architecture and barely a nod toward horticulture.  Historic structures have been removed at an alarming rate and there doesn’t seem to be any sort of movement with momentum to stop the madness.

Years ago, most of the streets looked like this…

 Today, many are turning into this…
Among the Casualties….
Clove Lake Stables
My grandmother, her youngest daughter and then my sister and I used to ride rented horses
through the park at one of the two big barns on the island, Clove Lake Stables.
The Stable was originally an ice house, and then converted to a Livery
by the Franzreb family when refrigeration made ice houses obsolete.
That’s me, second from left.
The horse was named Gaslight and I adored him.
I had a plan to someday rescue him when I had a farm of my own.
By the time that happened, Gaslight and the farm were gone.
Sister on pony
In it’s place is a large housing development.
Cedar Grove Beach
My cousin and I braving the waves at waters edge…
Mom with cousin Jay
Recent times…
Cedar Grove was a small cottage community on the water  facing the city.  Three generations of my family enjoyed summers there in rented bungalows.  It wasn’t glamorous, but it was a safe, friendly beach where everyone knew their neighbor and pitched in to keep the place up. Many families had rented the same bungalow for fifty years or more. This year it all came to an end . The article below sums it up beautifully.
Cedar Grove Beach All Washed Up

By Matt Chaban

October 4, 2010
There was no eleventh hour rescue for Cedar Grove, no life preserver for the 99-year-old beach community on Staten Island’s South Shore, the last of its kind. Despite resident’s best hopes, the politicians and preservationists backing the Grovers could not reach a deal with the Bloomberg administration or the Parks Department to save the bungalows at least for another season, to say nothing of another century. Even Andrea Peyser — Andrea Peyser! — couldn’t woo them.
Grovers still maintain there is no reason to spend good money tearing down a good beach — it’s much cleaner than its city-owned neighbors — that pays $140,000 to the Park’s Department every year to exist. It will cost millions of dollars in capital money to tear down the houses and reopen the stretch next year, which is and has always been publicly accessible. At the same time, beaches across the city, including some just up the shore, have been closed due to lack of funds. Never mind that the city is so desperate for money that it is considering selling off its parking meters to fill the widening budget gap.
At midnight Saturday, Cedar Grove was no more. Parks police was on hand to see to that, according to the news -Parks Department officers guarded the club’s gate as members carried out their belongings. “It’s been tough because I’ve been finding a lot of old family memorabilia,” said John Murphy, 52. The Staten Island Advance has been covering the saga closely and has its own tale of woe:
The season at Cedar Grove Beach Club opened each year with the raising of American flags from each of the 41 bungalows. [Saturday], those same flags were flying upside down. “It signals a vessel in distress,” said Roy Wood, a retired Sandy Hook pilot. After nearly a century, time has run out for Cedar Grove. Its lease with the city expired yesterday, an occasion made even grayer by the rain.
 Edith Holtermann pulled the remaining produce from her garden.    side-note from Karen –  (Mrs. Holtermann was my gym teacher in high school – she could throw a mean volley ball if you aggravated her in just the right way.)    Mick Kenny took one last view from his back deck. Jennifer Fitzgerald-Young stood on her porch with her daughter, Elizabeth, who at 9 months is Cedar Grove’s youngest resident. Eric Lesnick hoisted his 5-year-old daughter, Lillianna, in his arms.
“We will miss you,” she scribbled on a bungalow wall.
The fate of this community and beach  remains to be seen.  Demolition of the cottages is on the agenda.
 The Family Homestead
Then
  We grew up in a century old farm house with a generous yard in the midst of an old family neighborhood. Big oak trees hung over our house and the streets were tree-lined too.  When I drive down the old street now, it’s a heavy feeling. Not much is familiar. The house was taken down for a much more profitable four-family times two. 
 Now

The original front door knocker  now mounted on my mother’s current door.
They don’t make them like they used to.

Some things that still exist
My grandmothers house of 42 years… though she moved away years ago
and has since passed on, this will always be Nana’s house to me.
Then

(we were all scared senseless in this photo, even though my cousin Ralph
was underneath the disguise. Santa’s just a scarey dude, why do we torture our kids this way?)
Now
My Aunt and Uncle still live in the house they built 50 years ago.
I used to feed the deer red berries off the bushes in their yard.
I thought I’de rescue them someday too…
and you know, that’s still a possibility.
I’m finding it ironic – the strong desire I had at 18 to get the heck out of Dodge and go find my life in the country….and this wish at midlife to be able to return, if only for a day, to that old familiar place where time was on my side, ambition ran high and all dreams were out there for the making. In those days, in that house, there was not yet the realization that all dreams cannot be met, all relationships will not work out as we would like, all things are not always possible, no matter how badly we work for, want or need them.
 
   The meaning in the quote “You Can’t Go Home Again”  as I see it..is this –  Even if the old homestead were still intact with every tree still standing, I am changed. I am different. I am polluted and crowded with the experiences of my life.  Standing on that very threshold would not bring me “home“, not as I knew it then.  Home is the here and now…and really, what am I looking for back there anyway.  It’s all good right here.

  Well…. there’s the food. But I can bring that back with me.
And I did.       

I must be getting old

  Is it just me or is my age showing?  I am not fond of this not-so- new and wildly popular trend in TV viewing – in particular, Reality TV.   It seems to thrive on the exploitation of all the weaknesses of the human race – like general stupidity and selfishness and superficial material worship among other things.  I don’t blame the participants…No.. I blame the people who came up with these shows AND the viewers who make them so wildly popular.  The reality stars are just making a living.

 I’m sure you’ve all heard of Jersey Shore by now, because it’s beyond wildly popular..and I just have to laugh out loud.  It’s my old stomping grounds from back in the day.

A conversation with my 14 year old:

Him:  Mom, did you ever hear of Jersey Shore?  It’s so cool, you gotta see it. There’s this girl.. Snookie?…

Me: Yes, I know the show. Actually, I know the place, intimately!

Him:  YOU DO NOT. …Jersey SHORE??… were you ever, like, THERE?….

Me:  Yeah, I was theah.  As many weekends as I cud get theah.  It’s wheah we hung ou
 (“t” is silent heah,  and you say the first pawt of “out” hawd and fast and end it quick) 

Him:  You Did Not. OMG you’re talking LIKE THAT!!!

Me:  Yeah so wut.  Go pahk the caw faw me and don’t step in the wahta outside the daw.

Him:  Mom, STOP, you sound so WEIRD.

Me:  Whateva

21

And so, my girl turns twenty one. 


Seems like just yesterday we were heading out of those big glass hospital doors, you safely tucked in your car seat dressed in way too much clothing. If I had my way there would have been bubble wrap too, and all cars would have been ordered off the streets until we got you safely home.  I remember thinking to myself ..” Are they really letting me out of here with this tiny little baby?….I’m going to be trusted with this little life all by myself, without a nurse nearby just in case?  What if I make a mistake? “ 


 I’m sure I’ve made mistakes, but there has been so much joy and love along the way, and it’s been my privilege and pleasure to have raised such a wonderful human being.  You have taught ME a few lessons in courage, strength and perseverance in the face of adversity. 


Dad and I are so proud of all you have accomplished, and we look forward to witnessing the wonderful life you have ahead of you….


Happy 21st Birthday to our Bean, Cookie, the doo, Kristabell, Cookie Crumb…   

21 lessons of life, learning and love

Originally written by Cheryl-Anne Millsap

1. Learn to forgive. Hurtful things are going to happen to you. Learn to let it go. Carrying a grudge is like trying to climb Mount Everest with a boulder in your backpack. It weighs you down and holds you back.


2. Say “I love you” and say “I’m sorry.” These really are the magic words. Learn when to say them, say them often, and mean it when you say them.


3. Be a child. Open your eyes every morning like you are opening them for the first time. Look closely at the world around you and find your place in it.


4. Never stop learning. Whenever you can, turn off the television and pick up a book. Take a class. Learn another language. Try something new. Travel. Explore the world around you. Exercise your mind.


5. Use what you’ve learned. You came into this world as helpless as any creature could be. But, by now, you should have most of the tools you’ll need to survive and thrive. Make good use of them.


6. Lose your ego. You won’t miss it.


7. Ask questions and question the answers. When you get the chance, ask a question. Search for the answers and when you think you’ve found them, look again.


8. Listen. Listen to music, to the birds and to the voices of people all around you. Listen to what they say and to what they aren’t saying. Listen to the little voice inside you.


9. Never lose your self respect. It’s the one thing you can take with you.


10. Hold a baby. Even if you never have one of your own, hold a baby in your arms now and then. Cradle them. Breathe the scent of a newborn. Think about the people who held you.


11. Practice gratitude. Look around you and count your blessings. Count them again.


12. Mind your manners. Make the world a kinder, gentler, place. And for heaven’s sake chew with your mouth closed.


13. Get a job. Learn the value of hard work. You don’t have to be rich or famous or powerful. You don’t have to play sports or be a movie star. Just do what you love and do it well.


14. Make friends but choose them carefully. Surround yourself with people who lift you up. Avoid those who want to drag you down.


15. Take a leap of faith. Sometimes, that’s all you can do.


16. Give until it hurts. Spend time with those you love. Share your thoughts and dreams. Give a little back to those who need it more than you do.


17. Learn the difference in fashion and style. Fashion is what looks good at the moment. Style is what fits you forever.


18. Try something new. Don’t be afraid of change. Break out of a rut. When you get too comfortable, stretch a little to see what happens.


19. Hold onto tradition. Hold onto your history by keeping at least one tradition alive. Cook the family mac and cheese recipe. Tell old stories again and again.


20. Reach out and touch someone. Hold a hand. Give a kiss. Hug someone who needs it.


21. Never forget. Remember that you are loved with a love that knows no bounds.

Count on that.

Spooked

  It’s a ridiculous thing I’ve been tormented by for most of my remembered life.  I LOVE a good horror movie.. a ghost story,  a haunted place.  And yet… it all  SCARES THE HELL OUT OF ME.  I still can’t watch The Exorcist all the way through, and I don’t even want to be in the same house as a Ouija board…. but it fascinates me still.    I kid you not… on Halloween I used to keep rosary beads and holy water on my windowsill so Vampires couldn’t come in, or at least I’d be prepared if they did.   Why the fear of Vampires?  I have no idea.  It’s probably not wise to tell you I finished all four Twilight books in nine days… NINE DAYS!.. but.. it put a whole new spin on the Vampire thing for me, you see. 

Thank you, Stephenie Meyer.

  What I’m really getting at is, I love Halloween. It’s my favorite holiday, and I think it’s because we get to step out of the box.   Be something, do something, dress like something different.  Anything!  The sky is the limit.  Nothing is really expected of you on Halloween.. it’s all for fun…and Candy Corn.

   This year the holiday brings with it a little sadness. My kids are beyond trick-or-treating with parents in tow.  My daughter is going to a  Halloween dance at her college and my son will be heading out with a group of his friends. Last year they were dressed as a wedding party and I at least got to buy him an old suit at the Goodwill store. He actually came with me to pick it out!   This year I asked if I could deck him out in Zombie attire and I just got an eye roll.  Alas…. the proverbial apron string has snapped.

   I already miss the evening walks with flashlights in hand, crunching fragrant leaves underfoot, and the  glorious smell of woodsmoke in neighboring fireplaces while the kids dart ahead from door to door to door.  Is it too much to ask if I still get to inspect and raid the stash when it’s dumped on the kitchen table at the end of the night?

I’m not one of those who dresses my dogs up for the holiday
 (not that there’s anything wrong with that)
These costumes, however, are awesome.

           My Favorite!

Love these too…

For those of you who are local… there are lots of spooky fun things to do in CT…
The Dark Manor Haunted House – voted CT’s No. 1 scariest haunted house attraction
Lyman Orchards Corn Maze, Thru Oct. 31
Haunted Hayride – This one made me scream like the little girl that I am no longer. 
 Great for tweens, teens, and adults especially.

October 21-23, 27-30; gates open at dusk
Corner of Ingham Hill Road and Elm Street, Old Saybrook
860.395.5550
Admission: $12; under 11, $6 ($1 discount with a canned food donation for the Shoreline Soup Kitchen)
More info: A possessed tractor-drawn wagon leads you into the deep, dark, demented woods for a 40-minute ride into the ghastly world of ghosts, goblins and ghouls. **WARNING: The haunted hayride is very scary and may be frightening to younger children; parental discretion is advised.
  

Rain & Randomness

  The rain feels glorious this morning. We’ve had a very dry, hot summer and the earth is thirsty.  Autumn has definitely arrived, but the colors in the sugar maples are muted… I’m thinking it has something to do with the lack of  rain. 

 I had lunch again at my favorite diner  (twice in one week, the shame of it)  and while there I asked if they’de be willing to give up their coconut chicken recipe.  The waitress came back minutes later and said just this..    ” The cook said real simple.  Dip the chicken cutlets in flour, then egg… then sweetened shredded coconut.  Pan fry in a small amount of butter or oil until golden brown. Use any sweet and sour dipping sauce for a side.”       They serve it with white rice, and I found another recipe that recommends marinating chicken cutlets in Coconut milk for a few hours beforehand.  I also recommend using thin sliced cutlets.  We gag on the fat ones around here.  Really

The guy on the right here is making me so proud these past few weeks… He’s doing a great job on his new Baseball team…he’s one of the rookies, for sure, and his game has improved tremendously.   I just received his progress report on his first month in High School… a strick Catholic HS, no less…. and he is doing a great job there too.  Big improvement from middle school and it’s been a huge effort on his part.  He even ties his own tie now. Amen, brothers.  And I mean that, with a hearty THANK YOU, LORD.   Yes I am aware of my views on religion in my previous post and the  occasional hypocracy I display here.   

  So, DUDE… great job, I’m so proud.  And.. next time we go to the diner I’ll let you suck down all the creamers just once without scolding, because sometimes I’m cool like that.

   I’ll go in to work today and begin packing up the remainder of the pottery.  The rain is fitting of the mood.  This gallery has brought so much to my life, all of it good, some of it difficult, a great learning experience  and a difficult door to unhinge.  That’s what it feels like I’m doing.

Mystic Pizza

 Today I  took my girl  (who apparently STILL NEEDS ME on occasion!  I won’t dwell on the fact that it usually revolves around replenishment of funds and stuff )  to Mystic Seaport for some retail therapy and Mystic Pizza – Do you know, they still play the movie in the actual joint? We had the Mediterranean and Buffalo Chicken specialty pies…  I will say, their pizza is OK… but it doesn’t compare to what we get at Modern or Pepe’s in New Haven. Of course, even in New Haven you can’t get the pie I grew up on in New York.  

 All over the restaurant there are photos of Julia and the cast, scenes from the movie…and other Hollywood icons as well.  Speaking of Julia… I have always loved her movies and she’s one of my favorite actresses.  I just don’t get the Eat Pray Love thing.. the book didn’t grab me and the movie didn’t either, although anyone could admire the scenery.  Am I the only one?