Tag: ha ha

Over-exposed?

Oh, come on now…
…have I really only inspired ONE of you to send me a
fridge pic?
I was kinda hoping to see the messy ones,
the empty ones,
the anal ones,
whatever ya got!
I guess it really IS sorta like being naked  🙂

If you’re a health nut and have some tips, share them.
If you want to make some changes, tell us about them.
If you’re already making dietary changes, big or small,
let us know about them by including them with your pic.

Let’s inspire each other here….I think it’s important.

 

I’m giving you one more day here…
someone.. anyone!… won’t you join my one other brave soul?


She ain’t kid’n.

State Trooper says  –  I made a traffic stop on an elderly lady the other day for speeding on U.S. 166 Eastbound at Mile Marker 73 just East of Sedan , KS.
I asked for her driver’s license, registration, and proof of insurance.

The lady took out the required information and handed it to me.

In with the cards I was somewhat surprised (due to her advanced age) to see she had a conceal carry permit. I looked at her and ask if she had a weapon in her possession at this time.

She responded that she indeed had a .45 automatic in her glove box. Something—body language, or the way she said it—made me want to ask if she had any other firearms. She did admit to also having a 9mm Glock in her center console. Now I had to ask one more time if that was all. She responded once again that she did have just one more, a .357 Magnum in her purse.

I then asked her what was she so afraid of.
She looked me right in the eye and said,
“Not a f*cking thing!”

You can’t make this stuff up

    The significant other went to the motor vehicle department here in Connecticut the other day to fill out registration paperwork.  When it came his turn to fill in some forms, he naturally went for the pen.  You know.. the kind that are attached to a string, stuck to the table?   All three on the forms table where dried up.  So he went to the counter to ask for a pen that writes. 

He said:   None of your pens on the form table are working, can I have a pen to fill out these forms?

She said:  I’m sorry, we don’t lend pens anymore. You’ll have to buy one over there at the pen machine for 50 cents.

He said:   Are ya kiddin?  I have to BUY a pen to fill out your forms?

She said:   That’s the way they’re doing things nowadays around here, sorry.

Other customer said to Him:   You can borrow my pen….. for 20 cents!

So, you Connecticut folks….. next time you have to head over to MV, make sure you bring a working pen.  Or two quarters for the machine.  Apparently.

Seems like yesterday

 Maah preshus baybeee started his sophmore year in HS today. 
 Holy crap. How can that be.
What does Steve Perry have to do with it? 
Well, here’s how it went. 
The rising son came home with a list of stuff he needed from Staples,
 like.. TODAY.
So I hopped in my faithful mom mobile and off I went for said supplies.
In the car, alone, I like to find a good song and sing my heart out.
If I did this with people nearby they’d run for cover.
A few channel hops and Steve Perry and Oh, Sherry came blasting out, 
 immediately transporting me back in time.
Funny how a song can do that…. 
make you feel for a few moments almost exactly as you did
way back then… 
Your first car, (pinto) a boyfriend who might or might not be the one  (wasn’t)
the windows rolled down and your long hair flowing..
the whole world your oyster,  possibilities endless.
….TIME seemed endless. 
I caught a piece of that today, on my way to Staples,  I did.
Thanks, Steve Perry, once again.

I don’t know if I ever really got over that crush.
 

Senior Moment

  … or Something.

   I’ve got this delicious jar of blueberry jam that a local resident by the name of Linda made and brought to our fundraiser this past weekend.  It’s almost gone already, because I cannot contain myself when I know it is sitting on the shelf in the refrigerator.  I’ve had two and three helpings a day on toast, it’s that good.

  
 I had my toast with jam at lunch time just because it was there and I had to have it…. and when I looked for the lid to the jam jar, it just vanished.  I looked high and low, under the cabinets, in the drawer beneath it.. in the refrigerator, in the sink… in the dog’s mouth…. I could not  fathom where the h*ll that lid went, because I hadn’t walked away from it and I didn’t see it fall and

IT .  WASN’T.  ANYWHERE.   

How ridiculous, it HAD to be somewhere. I looked in a 20 foot radius incase it had rolled.  Nope.  Finally I gave up and went about my business. I did laundry, washed the dishes in the sink, answered e-mail and made a few phone calls for the upcoming dog event.  Then I went outside to pick some lettuce for the chickens.  What did I spy way out in the GARDEN?

 In my defense, the bracelet has a magnetic clasp and it’s HEAVY, people.
 It coulda happened to anyone, right? 
Right.

Pickles

 My first attempt at pickles was an epic fail. I used a six-week pickle recipe out of  Trisha Yearwood’s cookbook, and I shoulda known right off the bat it was gonna flunk.  I could not find two of the ingredients – cinnamon  & clove oil.  I tried health food stores, pharmacies even (which is where she says to look for it) … and the pharmacist said.. “I wouldn’t sell it to you for a food product!! You don’t eat it!”… and so I tried the recipe with cinnamon sticks and whole cloves instead.  For whatever reason, they were terrible.  I love Trishas cookbook and use many recipes from it, so I will not lay blame there.

My next attempt was yesterday!  And I think we have a winner. There are plenty of pickling methods, but a fellow blogger, Lisa of Two Bears Farm,  recommend using a packet she found in Walmart in the canning section and loved. So off to Walmart I went, and I did find it.

  What’s kinda humorous is… it says right there on the label that it’s  “Canning made easy”.
Let me tell ya, the easy part is mixing spices together.
The hard part… is all the boiling to sterilize lids and jars,
cleaning and cutting up of 5,273 cucumbers
ok that’s an exageration. but not by much!
and then the stuffing, sealing and boiling of the jars in the canner.
LOOK AT ALL THE POTS & UTENSILS
IT TOOK FOR JUST SIX QUART JARS.
The husband said ..
“Well, this was the sole job of women
back in the day. Preparing food all day!
And seems to me it was pretty relaxing work!”
HA!  
As if someone ELSE were doing the laundry beaten over rocks in the stream,
 tending to the kids, cleaning the homestead and feeding the ranch hands
and farm animals, nursing the sick, darning the clothes,
tending the fires and … and… and….
You know what?  Pickle making was a breeze  🙂