health and well being – This Old House 2

Something Delicious this way comes…

The Mr. and I have been minding our food intake – and typical of men!!… he lost 13 pounds in the first two weeks on Nutrisystem and I’ve lost 2. I aim for healthy foods, plenty of greens, smaller portions, much less dairy, much less sugar, grains, no red meat. He has more to lose than I do, but still… I’d be more than half way to my goal if I lost 13 pounds by now! I don’t like Nutrisystem though, even though it works – if you ask me – that’s crap food although it’s tasty, and if you like eating healthy fresh not frozen and packaged processed stuff, it’s not sustainable for the long haul. That’s probably why he lost 40 lbs on it last year, and gained it all back when he went off the program. I think what it does teach is portion control. So you can succeed on the system once you get off their food program, as long as you keep to the portions, etc. That’s the trick.

I’ve always been active due to the horses and farm chores and I like to walk/hike/kayak, etc. I’ve also got a full weights system out in the garage/gym thanks to the men of this family and I’ve used it frequently for light weight training. It definitely helps with the fibromyalgia pain to KEEP MOVING. When I was diagnosed a few years ago after living with chronic all over muscle pain for years without answers, I was given the option to take various meds. Ask me how much I hate to take pills – and so I opted to try natural ways of coping with this pain-in-the neck condition. I’m here to tell you – If you suffer with chronic pain from any source – good diet and exercise definitely help. Choose with your doctor what’s right for you depending on your condition, but no matter what, keep moving.

I had my yearly physical yesterday and all is good – blood pressure, sugar, cholesterol, etc. Low on Vitamin D, which is important, so I’ll take in more dairy and broccoli, etc.. and add a supplement back in. I’m going to continue with the weight loss goals, hopefully by summer I’ll be 15 pounds lighter. Or at least 10.

That being said!!… there was a recipe in last week’s paper that looked delicious and easy and made with fresh ingredients and I just had to try it regardless of our weight loss goals. WOW – it’s super good, and super easy. We had it for dinner last night and I’ll share it here with you… I don’t even like pepperoni, but it was not overpowering in this dish – If you like a good vodka sauce that tastes really fresh and light? This one’s for you..

Pepperoni Pasta

2-3 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil
1 medium sweet onion, diced
4 cloves garlic, minced
1 28 ounce can diced tomatoes
1 jigger vodka (optional but really adds to the flavor)
1/2 pound thinly sliced pepperoni
salt and pepper to taste
1/4 teaspoon cayenne pepper (if you like it spicy, add more, but be careful)
1/4 cup heavy cream ( I added a little more for creamier texture)
2 tablespoons chopped fresh basil
Fresh grated Parmesan Romano mix cheese
1 pound pasta- the grooved kind hold the flavor of the sauce better, but any pasta will do

* next time I will use less pasta so that there is more sauce, but truthfully it was so flavorful it wasn’t a problem for taste.

Fill a large pot with water and cook your pasta of choice – al dente when done.

While that cooks, in a dutch oven or large skillet, warm oil and add onion and garlic. Cook over medium-low heat until translucent (try not to brown it). Add the entire can of diced tomatoes. When hot, add vodka and cook for about four minutes, at which point most of the liquor will have evaporated. Toss in pepperoni and stir, cook for another few minutes. Add salt and pepper to taste and add cayenne pepper. Just a little gives a punch, so don’t overdo it unless you love spicy hot. After a few more minutes, add the cream. It should be a pretty coral color. When pasta is al dente – drain and put it in the sauce in a bowl or the dutch oven, whatever works for you. Toss to coat – then add the grated cheeses and the fresh chopped basil, toss again – and Enjoy!

You will not be disappointed with the flavor.

This and That, because clever post titles are hard to come by

For those who left comments on the Dear 2020 post, thank you for joining the conversation on a difficult topic. For me it’s therapeutic to talk it out amongst like minded people, and even to hear a different view when it’s not laced with hate. I’m not religious, but I’m praying for the mental health and humanity of our society as a whole as history unfolds. What a world it could be if not for our own vices, greed and destruction. If only we could just respect each other’s differences and work together for the common good of all. So simple, so attainable, and yet so far from our reality.

Onward! The frigid conditions here on the farm have lifted – in the upper 20’s as I type, and it feels downright balmy. I tried something that worked during our deep freeze – If you water critters outside during winter months – keeping that hydrant from freezing is sticky business. Stuffing a water bucket with hay, and then flipping that over the hydrant when not in use.. works!

The paddocks where a skating rink after the deep freeze. Thankful my husband owns a sanding truck (for work purposes) and I was able to let the horses out into the paddocks after they made a sweep through with the sand/salt. After losing my beloved Opie, I don’t need another equine loss due to a broken leg. Speaking of which – the mini’s and our boarder’s horse, the very old (32 years!) Max are getting along really well – right now I’ve brought them up to the big barn from their smaller shed. Their paddock is still a skating rink, so they’re sharing Max’s for the moment and with Opie’s passing we have a vacant stall. They really like the new arrangement – it’s like they’ve moved up to the big boys dorm.

In my never ending quest to lose this miserable menopausal weight and make healthier eating choices, I came across this chickpea salad recipe – so easy to throw together, very refreshing, too. Recipe and this photo credit to the Striped Spatula… link below photo.

Recipe HERE

Along with this dieting gig which I have yet to really really stick with for the long haul, I do keep up with at least a minimal exercise routine. Daily I tend to the horse and chicken chores, which is usually about an hour of work, but I also get in some aerobic exercise with the dogs – we walk at least four days a week, most often on the farm, where there are fields, hills and woods and long dirt roadways that make it easy, and hard to find excuses since it’s right outside the door. Occasionally I get on the treadmill, but it bores the hell out of me. Being outside and moving along is more motivation for a person like me, anyway.

Bailey, Frasier and Sally love these walks – I leave our cardiac patient, my Dane, Ben – inside on these cold days. There’s another shot of the big window from afar.

Sometimes we get in the car and visit the cottage (Stella) – where I walk the island – also a two miler IF I use all the roadways there. There is also a state park just five minutes from here with a beautiful roadway that circles a pond and stream and even a waterwheel and covered bridge. It’s so beautiful, I scold myself for not using it more often – free if you walk in!

I throw light weight training in for good measure, just three sets of twelve reps, four different muscle groups, doesn’t take long but reaps benefits of keeping me feeling strong, even when I hurt. I’m no expert, but one of my friends who is an expert agrees – I highly recommend a combo of simple stretching, walking and light weight training for anyone, and especially those who are middle to older aged. You don’t need to beat yourself into the ground or use a fancy gym – just a few light handweights you can buy at your local Target or Walmart and a good pair of walking sneakers, etc. will do the trick. Get bored easily like me? Switch it up now and then with a bike ride or kayak or yoga.

Sometimes the very simplest advice turns out to be the best, right?

Use it or lose it…

Arriving home from the woods walk yesterday, I surveyed the current garden plot situation…

What a difference six months makes, huh? Some shots from last summer below… (My weeding skills could be honed some, tis true.)

Tonight I’ll pull out the seed catalogs and

place an online order.

I’m not paid to say anything on this blog…
If I endorse it, I’ve had success with it.

My favorite seed source is Baker Creek Heirloom seeds..

Link HERE.

I find their seeds to be healthy, meaning they actually perform

if you follow the directions properly, and the plants hearty.

That gorgeous zinnia row to the left is courtesy dear friend Hilary
of Crazy As a Loom. She sent seeds from her garden
last year and they flourished.

I have placed the reply option with comments again – last time I did that, many reeaders had trouble leaving a comment at all. So often I want to thank you or answer questions to comments left, remaining silent seems rude, but had no option when I removed that feature. My comments no longer are delivered to my e-mail, where I used to be able to answer. If you visit frequently, leave a comment to let me know you were able to. Let’s see if I got it right this time.

As always – thank you for stopping by.

Christmas has left the building

For those who celebrate… when does Christmas arrive in your home ? As for we of This Old House, the day after Thanksgiving and all through that weekend, the tree and all the stuff settles in. I absolutely love this holiday – for the joy those little lights and the old fashioned bulbs and the Christmas baking bring to the atmosphere, the fond memories rekindled of those big Italian Christmas gatherings at my Aunt’s house with all the cousins and aunts and uncles, and memories of the beautiful decor in my grandmother’s warm home (there were even red bows on the picture frames!) I have a few ornaments from my mom’s tree, a cherished addition on our tree year after year. I also love gifting people. That held true back in the day when I didn’t have a pot to you-know-what in… and today as I find ways to be creative in the gift giving. The beauty of that is, creative gift giving doesn’t have to cost an arm and a leg – and sometimes it’s even free, the gift of your efforts and time. It is truly the thought that counts.

So about that timing thing. My neighbor across the road doesn’t put her tree and decorations up till Christmas Eve. Heck, we’re almost done by then. Her tree twinkles in the living room window until far into February, while ours is cleared out at the first of the year. For me, once Christmas is over, it’s over. As the new year comes in, I want a fresh clean approach, including inside the house.

This year I noticed the decor after operation Christmas clean-up felt a little stale, so I decided to take down some window treatments, move some wall hangings, clear some of the decor clutter, change up the mantels on the fireplaces, and try real hard, and believe me the struggle is real, to not drag out and display MORE decor clutter in the process. It just feels good to simplify.

With the first of the year came the never ending and never quite accomplished resolution to eat healthier, lose the extra weight and add more exercise. So, I’ve kick started that goal yet again, broken-record message or not. It’s never too late to get going, keep going… Onward. After some research I decided to stick with what will probably work in the long haul, using the WW points system via phone app to monitor carb intake. Diets like KETO just aren’t sustainable for a person like me, anyway. That one in particular involves too much meat consumption, and while I know it gets results, I doubt it’s great long-term for anyone’s arteries.

Wishing you all good things in the new year – thank you for stopping by.

I want to be your friend…

A friend shared this on her FB and Instagram yesterday… and it struck a certain cord with me.

When I was a young person I never though of myself as attractive. I was a brunette olive skinned green eyed athletic kind friendly generous warm 120 lb. person, but I thought I was ugly. There are very few photos of me smiling because I thought I had an unattractive smile… so I didn’t. I was not the popular blonde blue eyed girl dressed in designer clothes and pumps in HS, and we’re programmed by peers and society that those things are important, so I believed. I tried not to stand out.. .just let me blend in, and that’s what I did. I had trouble focusing on any subjects in HS and college that I wasn’t interested in and I was busy being “busy” with the things that did intrigue me- like horses, animals, time spent with the boyfriend and g-friends, and a few subjects like English, writing, music (band) that I enjoyed. So I didn’t think I was particularly smart either. My experiences since have shown me my truths, but that was then, this is now. How we talk to ourselves, never mind how others talk to us… our self talk is so very important. Keeping it positive is key to our well being and we are the only ones in control of that conversation.

I strongly believe that the relationship a girl has with her father shapes an important part of what she believes of herself , too- and while my father wasn’t evil in any way, his narcissism didn’t make room for him to nurture others, so my sister and I did not have that important corner built into our foundation. I think what I love most about my husband is that he is such a caring, devoted father – with just enough tough and a whole lot of love for our children. I see how it helps them believe in themselves and I hope in my efforts as a mother I did the same.

It took me many years and a lot of living, some big mistakes, some therapy even, and some caring people, good role models in my life , like my mother, to get to this place I am now. I really really like who I am, who I have become. I’m no dope, I’m a decent mom, a good friend, I’m generous where I can be, and I put in more at work than I’m asked. Heck – even at the age of 53 with 25 extra pounds, wrinkles, age spots, grey hair, tired eyes – I like the person I see in the mirror. A lot. The old part of me that is still me thinks what I just typed sounds conceited – don’t I see the fat? the short legs? the small breasts? the imperfect skin? . The wiser me knows I’ve earned every piece of me and it’s all a beautiful gift. That’s true of you, too, and I say it’s time to believe.

So I read that statement up there at the top yesterday and I said .. Yes. Exactly. What am I waiting for? Why the hold up? I’ve been fighting with the same 25 lbs. for years now – When you’re 5’4, 25 lbs is a lot of extra weight to lug around. I’ve taken some off, then put it back on. Then took some more off, then put it back on. I tried the big diets, the little changes. They work and then I fail to follow them. Food is my stress reliever, I don’t drink much or smoke, etc. I do work out, but I don’t love it, I’m no gym rat. Hence – those 25 lbs. But I have a few health issues, High BP and fibromyalgia, that really demand I take better care of myself. I woke up this morning – read that statement up there one more time, and said this is it. Today is the day I figure this out and stick to the plan. Of course I’ve said that 1,000 times before. That doesn’t mean this time it won’t work. That’s defeatism and I’m not about defeat. My life and it’s quality depends on it. The fibromyalgia tells me daily to pay attention to what I’m putting in my mouth, to keep moving. I walk, muck stalls, garden, kayak, light weight train. That’ what I enjoy, so that’s what I’ll stick with.

The other pact I’m going to make with myself is to stop following the news daily – In my opinion, the asshat we currently have in office doesn’t deserve my peace of mind, I will not pay for his ignorance and those of his ilk. I do feel humankind will be the cause of it’s own demise, but I can’t change humankind. I can only do good in the place I reside right here, right now and hope it has some ripple effect. The pebbles tossed in the ocean, you know. I’m also putting the iphone down – not lugging it around everywhere I go – it’s an awful habit I’ve gotten into, almost like pavlov’s dog.

Enough. Are you with me? I kinda love me, do you love you? Feel free to share in the comments below the habits you choose to take care of you, and even what you love about yourself, I want to hear it. – There are plenty of excuses any of us can find and hold on to – If you’ve been stalling, like me… we aren’t a fail, we’re a new jump start. Ready? Let’s do it….. and for Heaven’s sake – smile. Every chance you get.

The One Without A Post Title…

.. because sometimes it just doesn’t come to you. And this one’s a real rambler – Got coffee?

We had a wonderful Father’s Day down at the cottage. My guy hardly ever takes a day off. His work ethic is why we have the nice things we have, but as I say often and more frequently lately…. what good is all that hard work/effort if you don’t get to enjoy it? I’m happy to report the Mr. spent most of the day relaxing at the shore, a much needed reprieve and reward for the most dedicated and loving father I could have ever asked for for my children.

When we pull around that corner onto our cottage road, it’s like taking a deep cleansing breath.

Last week I painted the steps that go down into the water. Throughout the summer they get coated with algae, etc. and become very slippery. I scrubbed them with baking soda and that helped, but it had to be done regularly and it was just one more thing to do. A neighbor a few cottages down used boat bottom paint with sand mixed in to paint his steps. The result is a sandpapery surface, non-slip. So, I bought a gallon of the stuff – ($150!!??) and painted the steps – the blue is a bit outlandish – but there aren’t many choices in boat bottom paint colors. It works like a charm.

Then.. on Sunday my son blew up the inflatable four person raft and I am proud to report I dropped my first anchor – yes I did. I waded out there with anchor, chain, float thing and ropes, sunk it good in the muck… kicked another anchor in the process… ick…. (the cove is an anchor graveyard) … and we proceeded to pop the float as we pulled it over the cedar railing. *sigh. Stuck some tape on it…. and tested it out…

The tape held and I went back out there yesterday with a pool patch kit – hopefully that will be that. I’ll keep you posted.

As for my own father on Father’s Day – my sister came to visit and took him out to lunch, so I was relieved of duty and yes, that sounds as awful to me as it probably does to you. I’ll stop by today with his gift, and bring him anything he needs. It will always feel like a chore in some ways, and that’s not an easy truth for me to admit, but it is what it is. He is not an evil person in any way – he’s just devoid of the type of normal emotions or actions or whatever it is I’m searching for that one would want to have with a parent. If you look up the term narcissist, that’ him in a nutshell. Being a devoted daughter to a narcissist father is something I don’t describe well and it doesn’t come naturally, in fact I’m still coming to terms with the feelings that accompany it but at least there is far less anger now. That’s good for my own health, never mind his.

So, on Father’s Day I reveled in time spent with my guy and our children and my mom – whom has in some ways been both parents for my sister and I and grandparent to my children.

Let me just put some high praise here for her mean, clean, refreshing, rejuvenating summer elixir of a gin and tonic…

On the better health front… I continue the light weight training, walking, kayaking, and attempts at better food choices. I say “attempts” because I still cheat with pizza or a cupcake but I’m getting better at it, dropping some weight and toning up. Don’t ever give in just because you’re not perfect. No one is perfect, no one gets it’s right 100 percent of the time. FUCK PERFECT – am I clear? I’m going to share with you a photo of my 61 year old friend, a personal trainer who is brutally honest in her own trials and tribulations and I think she gets it absolutely right on aging well and being kind to yourself – and NEVER GIVING UP.

Yep – this is Joey at 61, pretty amazing – not claiming perfection, not a care free life – she’s had her share of woes and tended agining and ill parents , raised three kids and mended a sick child and husband and worries about finances and health and suffers injuries and and and… …

Her words on a recent FB post – “Coming up on the end of my 61st year (for those not in the know, your birthday makes the end of a year not the beginning) meaning I’ll be 61 but in my 62nd year of life. I continue to persist in the fight against aging with the biggest tool in the box – strength training. Add a few short cardio bursts and a restorative class like stretch or yoga each week and you’ve done your best. Never give up!” Another Joey gem – “I think people get unhappy with progress and give up, but it’s a disservice to their future health and mobility, hence deterioration. KEEP MOVING.

So yeah.. we can all find excuses. And sometimes – especially with fibromyalgia pain! … it just doesn’t feel awesome to keep moving – but we must. Life and the effort we have to put into it is worth every extra step taken – Just do it.

Have a good week, all – sharing a NOT GOOD FOR YOU pie recipe, because hey I already told you I ain’t shooting for perfection and what says Summer is Coming 💦🍈 better than a Lemonade Pie, I ask you….

*not my picture or recipe – recipe link below…

Lemonade Pie

Have a good week, all –

Little Gems with big impact

With summer just around the corner, gardening on the farm and that little bit I do at the cottage by the sea is in full swing.

Mowing happens weekly, weeding happens almost daily – and here’s what I discovered about that… It’s much easier to take a four prong rake and simply claw through the soil in a garden regularly than bend over and hand pick out weeds now and then. I suck at the hand picking, because I get lazy about it and it gets, well.. out of hand. The frequent raking is so much easier. And the plants love the “aired out” soil.

As I do that little chore I remember how I learned this simple technique – wise words of an old farmer friend, Louie. He was a master gardener, and he kept his secrets close to the vest. Now and then he’d toss us a gem. One of those was… “you like to breathe, don’t you? Well… so do the plants.” 79 year old Louie passed years ago, suddenly, out in his garden. A sad day. A post on the old gardener, HERE.

Living on a farm, but not having grown up on one… takes work, mistakes happen, and a readjustment of the sails is needed, frequently. We’ve had a small horse farm for 30 years – but only for the last 8 have we lived here at This Old House among fields of hay. It had pretty much gone to the weeds when we acquired the property – How many of you knew that growing hay isn’t as simple as letting the grass get really really long and then cutting it? (we didn’t). Indeed.. there is a whole science to growing good feed hay and even mulch hay or cow feed hay (which has different requirements than horse hay) – from the type of seed you plant, to the ridding of unwanted and even toxic weeds, to the amount of sun and rain available that season, to the number of DRY days strung together so you can cut it at the right time, toss it, let it dry, toss it again, and get it baled up and off the fields before the rain comes. Then there’s the baling or rolling.

We’ve just started our first cutting – a little late due to the number of rainy and cold days we’ve had. What we notice this year is we added in too much clover in a few sections of some of the fields… Clover molds up easily in hay bales – and mold in a hay bale means you throw it out instead of feeding it. Cows and their multiple stomachs have more tolerance for crap hay than horses do, but with horses you don’t want colic (bad stomach ache that can turn deadly) … so you throw out any bales that are iffy. That costs money.

You learn as you grow.

Speaking of learning – on the better health front, I’ve discovered having lived with fibromyalgia for a while now, two things are very important to anyone living with chronic pain.

First – despite the pain you feel daily, KEEP MOVING. Unless of course you’re actually injuring yourself more. (your doctor can direct you) It really does help you feel better and keeps you mobile. My cousin has a severe form of arthritis, has since he was very young. He gets regular IV infusions of a strong drug that helps him keep going. And keep going he does – having just completed a 70 mile mountain bike ride. He is my hero. As for me, I’ve been light weight training out in the gym, hiking with the dogs, kayaking occasionally and walking/running on the tread mill when the hiking is hindered by weather or heat.

Secondly – what you put in your mouth matters. Besides the increased exercise I’ve also been trying to eat better – I know after several attempts over the years to conform to certain diets, I’m just not gonna stick to it. What I can do is be more conscientious about what I put in my mouth. It really and truly is all about what you put in your mouth. The icing is the exercise but it all starts with consumption.

Something else I feel very strongly about – A good way to bring more joy to your own life, to feel a sense of accomplishment, for better mental health and a connection to your community, a connection to people in general, and a way to focus on the positive aspects of life instead of being dragged down into the swamp muck that also exists – is to be a part of the good works going on out there. Volunteer in whatever capacity you are able – don’t ever doubt that even the smallest outreaches have value. Every drop in the ocean contributes to that ocean.

I was recently the recipient of the Melvin Jones Fellow Award given by the Lions Club International in our community for my humanitarian contributions in our little town. What an inspirational evening it was, with my family in attendance. To be among like minded people who are so giving of themselves, so caring and motivated to make change for the better in our community and in society itself is uplifting. It makes the other not so pleasant “stuff” of life seem not so imposing, looming, dooming. This doesn’t mean you have to commit to joining a club, either – I am not a Lion.

Some easy ideas – Got grain bags? Collect the discarded ones and give them to someone who recycles them into tote bags. Recycling is an awesome thing to do for our environment. Got stuff you don’t need or wear anymore? Give to the local Salvation Army or Good Will. Volunteer at the local dog shelter once a week – walk a dog, get in your exercise- win win. Love books? Got a volunteer local library? Take a shift. Donate Blood. Like to knit? Make hats for the homeless, make lap blankets for those who live in a local nursing home. Bake for the church events, the fire house events. Join the walks at the Relay for Life events held around the nation. It’s awesome if you’re financially well off enough that you can give monetary donations to causes you believe in, but that doesn’t have to be the case. Your time, your caring contributions are just as valuable.

When I saw this picture after the event I said – Jeez, Karen – go get a haircut. And so I did.

Side note: The sharing of these pics is not intended to imply that I believe I’m – all that- in any way. But I have learned to appreciate all that is good about me, instead of the laser focus I used to have on all that is not perfect. What a perfect waste of time. If you’re doing that to you, stop the nonsense. Take stock of your strengths and nourish them. Encourage the art of looking for the good, in you and in others. The ripple effect, ya know – that drop in the ocean? yeah.

So about that hair cut – Another tip that was passed along to me and I’ll share with you. I’m not one to fuss a heck of a lot with the aging experience or make up and hair. I’m hoping like everyone else that I stick around for along while and age gracefully and naturally. I love LOOONG hair, but for most of us it’s not particularly flattering to just let it grow out and hang there, drab and without decent shape. That ages us. I’m lazy about going to the hairdresser, admittedly. There’s no doubt, though, when I get in there and tell them to lift me up, indeed they do. So take care of yourself in the little ways that help us appreciate who we are and what we have. It matters.

A shout out to my niece, who graduated from Uconn… and landed a job in their finance department! Yesterday the family gathered at The Mansion at Bald Hill in Woodstock, CT to celebrate her accomplishment and future success –

Thanks for stopping by –

Heavy and Light

For lemon lovers, here’s a cupcake frosting recipe I found on Pinterest, the recipe and photo originated at rosebakes.com.

Lemon Cream Cheese Frosting

INGREDIENTS

2 sticks of real (salted) butter, at room temperature
4 ounces of shortening
4 ounces of cream cheese, at room temperature
1/2 Tablespoon vanilla extract
8-9 cups of powdered sugar
1/2 cup fresh lemon juice
2-3 Tablespoons milk

INSTRUCTIONS

In a large mixing bowl, cream together the butter, shortening, and cream cheese until very smooth. Add in the vanilla and mix again.
Begin adding powdered sugar, one cup at a time up to 8 cups.
Your frosting will be very stiff at this point – now add in the lemon juice and 2 tablespoons of milk.
Mix and check the consistency.
From here, I had to add a little more powdered sugar (it was too soft) but then I went too far, so I added a little more milk. Just play with it until you get a consistency you’re happy with! I made mine on the softer side so it was silky smooth …

And since we started with a sugary treat, let’s balance it with something healthy. Oh the struggle is real, a balance I don’t always get right. This recipe and photo courtesy Wellplated.com

Tomato Eggplant Zucchini Bake with Garlic and Parmesan.

Produce

1/4 cup Basil, fresh
1 pint Cherry or grape tomatoes
1 Eggplant, small medium
4 large cloves Garlic
1/4 cup Parsley, fresh
3 Zucchini (about 1 1/2 pounds), medium

Spices

1/4 tsp Black pepper, ground
1/4 tsp Kosher salt

1 tbsp Olive oil, extra-virgin

2/3 cup Parmesan cheese

Directions:

Preheat the oven to 350 degrees F. Lightly grease a deep 9×9-inch baking dish or similar 3 1/2-quart casserole dish with nonstick spray.

Quarter the zucchini then cut into 1/2-inch slices and place in a large mixing bowl (each piece of zucchini should be roughly 1/2 to 3/4 inches in size). Next, slice the eggplant into 1/4-inch rounds, then stack the rounds and cut into roughly 3/4-inch pieces. Add to the bowl with the zucchini. Halve the cherry tomatoes and add them to the bowl. Drizzle the cut vegetables with the olive oil, then add the garlic, salt, pepper, 1/3 cup of the Parmesan cheese, and half of the basil and parsley. Toss gently to combine.

Transfer the vegetables to the prepared baking dish. Bake for 25 minutes, cover the pan with aluminum foil, then continue baking for 10 to 20 additional minutes, until the vegetables are tender. Sprinkle with the remaining Parmesan cheese, basil, and parsley. Serve warm.

As for this government shut down – 45 once said it is the President’s fault when the government shuts down – He also said it would never happen on his watch because he is the great deal maker. There is actually a documentary about his first year in office – consisting of his 2000 lies told in this first year. He’s since added at least 50. That this is OK with ANYONE, for any reason and on any level.. is flabbergasting.

Women are marching again this weekend – I’m not attending but I’ve donated to the cause once again and bought the tee shirt too, because I think it’s so important to call this blossoming bullshit what it is. None of it’s new.. but it’s found a stronger foothold thanks to 45, hard to imagine in these “enlightened” times. We’ve gone backward as a society, not forward, and at an alarming speed.

I’m convinced it will be women who save humanity eventually. Men have been in charge till now and look how they’ve managed to f*ck it all up. *** TO BE CLEAR – there are many, many decent men out there. Many. Just not the ones who currently wield all the power… and if you look at our world history – it’s man’s ego and greed that dragged us through the ugliest times. I think it’s women who will eventually make this world a more humane place in every aspect. Not as superiors to men, but as equals. We have certainly earned our place.

On the fitness front – I’ve stopped beating myself up over failed attempts to achieve my best body weight. Life hands you enough insults, no? I’m tired of adding to the heap, so I’ve been working on my interior voice – the one that shouts when I look in the mirror “You’re still fat! WTF! Stop the nonsense! Girl, where’s your will power?”… have you heard that interior voice too? She sucks.. she’s sapping the joy right out of everything and it truly doesn’t help the cause.

So this is what I’m working on…the new dialogue from the inside – OK – today’s a new day – so far you’ve managed a good intake of water and you’ve been out for that hike with the dogs. Most of your food choices were healthy. You need to work on the portion sizes, and you know you didn’t need the cupcake, but it’s done. Let’s do better tomorrow, but you got some good stuff in there today. Onward.

So much better, right?

I’m walking every day that it’s not absolutely frigid – a few miles anyway, up and down hills and some nice straightaways. I’m drinking more water – these two things are so important for all of us, mild exercise regularly and hydration. I have found that filling up a favorite large mug of water and leaving it out on the counter at room temperature has been a successful habit to form. I’m drinking more water and I’m not using all that plastic from refrigerated bottles. Room temperature water is easier to drink, too.

I take Vitamin B12, D3 and Biotin daily. I’m finding sticking to the combination of all these things is helping the Fibromyalgia and I am feeling better and stronger over all. As we get older, any significant slacking off comes home to roost quickly. It’s important to keep moving, keep striving to gain or keep better health. Doesn’t have to be an obsession, just a gentle daily process with a little wiggle room and forgiveness when you don’t get it perfect.

*That word shouldn’t exist, truth be told. Nothing.. is perfect, ever.

What steps do you take for your well being, emotionally and physically? Feel free to share them in the comments below – and I’ll leave you with a little gem a friend shared on her page..

Till soon, friends –

When the new way isn’t the best way

I’m 52 years old. That means I grew up before cell phones, before personal computers, before the term “helicopter parent” was coined. Raised in a suburb of the Big Apple, our neighborhood was our playground. On weekends we were out in the ‘hood till dinner time, then out again till the streetlights went on. If mom wanted me in, she called over the fence or rang the neighbors house in the vicinity of where we were playing. Playing!.. kickball, tag, bikes, skateboards, House Boat in our neighbors lawnmower trailer (our seating consisted of peat moss bags and we considered it luxurious).

Twelve years was the standard age to begin babysitting, and being located in an apparently fertile neighborhood, there were many charges to “sit”. My friends and I jumped right in to the babysitters pool as soon as we were of age. At fourteen I worked at the Staten Island zoo taking care of the ponies at the pony ride track. I also cleaned house for an elderly neighbor and at sixteen I waitressed at a catering hall near our home. That might sound like a lot but it wasn’t, not in that day. Most everyone I knew was doing the same and if you’re near my age or older, your story is probably similar. It was expected of us, and we liked the feeling of making our own money, playing grown-up in this little way, learning.. what it means to be responsible, to be an adult.

In elementary school I walked to and from the school with friends. I was expected to get myself there and home again, along with everyone else. I was bullied a little by a few local boys briefly, but figured out how to show them I wasn’t taking their crap. (flipped one over my shoulder, as he tried taking my hat for the 15th time. We are friends to this day) As teens we experienced a flare of racial tension at the high school and as I traveled to and from school on the public transit bus and joined a predominantly black track team, a few of those girls tried bullying me. I understood their problem with accepting me, they had experienced the ugliness of racism and it’s hard to know who to trust, so the walls go up. Eventually we found our way to a mutual respect and then a friendship. We had all figured out how to turn it around, on our own.

Here’s why I just typed all that out. There’s a trend I’m hearing and seeing in this community and it’s happening all over the country – young people having a really difficult time in their teen years with anxiety, severe depression, eating disorders, behavioral issues, substance abuse. It’s not like those are new issues, but it seems to me and a few friends I’ve discussed this with, that they are far more prevalent now than they ever were before.

My son, now 21, came to have lunch with me at the house today. I asked him what he thought about this particular issue and what he said kinda shocked me, and then made a heck of a lot of sense.

” Kids today have everything done for them. Anything goes wrong, mom or dad sweep in and take care of it. When we were in High School, how many kids actually had a job besides school? Not very many. Even in college, how many had a job? The schools are set up now in a way that if there’s any problem whatsoever, the school steps in and manages the crisis or doesn’t allow the scuffle or makes a team or award all about equal time or participation instead of earned accomplishment. So when a real life crisis comes along or a goal is hard to reach, and those factors like parent or school aren’t in the vicinity to manage it, the kid has no tools to manage it for himself. He/she doesn’t know what to do because he/she has never had to figure it out for himself. ”

He continued… “Social Media is a bad influence- most people post their very best selves, so all you see is a perfect life on the screen, not all the realities. It’s not an honest picture of real life. You’re feeling insecure about your looks or your life and you see how perfect everyone else’s life appears on the screen and it makes you feel worse about yourself. It’s also easier to bully someone if you’re not face to face. Social Media is not a great thing for young people”.

* don’t we all see older people behaving pretty badly on social media as well

BOOM.

It’s not lost on me that I have at times absolutely been a helicopter mom. Funny thing – I have always been a fierce protector of my children and despite all those efforts I have not been able to keep them from experiencing some hard realities life throws at you. Something I think I got right – they were given responsibilities and expected to pull their weight around the house and in their places of employ and at school. There were consequences if they didn’t. I’m very lucky that despite handing them those phones at a fairly young age, and admittedly because it helped me keep in touch with them and keep my own anxiety in check regarding their whereabouts, we have managed to make it through those years and into adulthood without some of the real damage this new way of being has apparently caused so many young people.

Note: Depression and Anxiety among other mental health issues is a very real thing, I’m not making light of it. I deal with anxiety myself, although thankfully it doesn’t cripple me. Genetics and environment play a role, too, and on this subject I am no expert.

What’s the answer? One thought I have – maybe the way we were raised didn’t need much fixing. Maybe doing everything for our kids is actually harming them instead of making life better than how we had it. Maybe how we had it.. was pretty darn good. As for those smartphones- well, it’s real hard to go backwards when the tool itself is so useful in so many ways. I hope we all figure it out before this next generation is ruined. Sometimes, the new way isn’t the best way..

Till soon, friends –

Sometimes you just gotta say it….

F*ck it.

Let me start off by expressing my utter disgust at my little self – I have been less than stellar in my weight loss journey this year. Oh, I’ve given it the old college try every now and again ( like, back in college, when I was young and fit and could drop ten pounds with a few extra sneezes) … but it’s been now… and again… ever since. My husband has lost 60 pounds since January… 60!!! SIX OH. He looks and feels fantastic. I’m so happy ~~and jealous~~ for him. What’s MY problem? FOOD. The general love of it, the preparing of it for others, STRESS. Having fibromyalgia doesn’t help matters either. When you hurt 24/7 and an hour of every single day is spent doing physical work out in the barn/coop/garden/yard shoveling sh*t among other things, it’s kinda hard to say… “Body? I know you just did all that for me and I thank you profusely for soldiering on despite the constant pain and ache while we together care for the 200 animals I insisted on taking in over the years. But.. can we just push it a little further? Like four miles on the treadmill? Let’s lift a few hundred more pounds, shall we?”

…. you know what Body says, right?

This had me laughing out loud…. ’cause you gotta keep your humor, hear me? –

To be clear, I’m not saying F*ck it to the diet or the exercise . No, we all need to keep doing that, even when it hurts. Use it or lose it, right? This is something different, and equally important…

We had some glorious weather this weekend and spent a good part of it down at the cottage once farm chores were done. Both sets of kids came and went as their schedules allowed and I love the time we all spend there.

On Saturday I watched as others swam, water skied, cruised in boats, on paddle boards, bobbled on and around giants floats – there are several in our cove neighborhood. It was hot. A great time to jump in the water. A great time to don a suit and just jump in. What did I do?….

I stuck my feet in the water off our cement dock pad and wished I hadn’t been such a slouch this spring in the eating and exercise department.

Sunday.. another glorious day… THIS TIME… I took a good look around, saw (damn it) the neighbors were all in attendance and entertaining guests, even(of course!) And I thought of how foolish I’ve been. I’m 52 years old, damn lucky to be here. I’m 20 lbs overweight and I don’t look as good as I used to in a suit. WHO CARES. WHO… CARES. And if someone does care? It’s their problem. I’ve got enough of my own.

My son was sitting in my kitchen the other day and I did the standard complaint – He said Mom, you say that all the time, you’ve been saying it for years. “Jeez, I’m so fat, that’s it, I’m gonna diet starting right now”. Stop the complaining, mom, just do it. He’s right! I don’t want to be the complainer. I want to be the doer. Change only comes if you change what you’re doing.

So… Sunday,… to start… I said F*ck it. I went inside and put on that suit and marched right back out, head held high,soaked up a few rays before slipping into that cool blue water. The kids joined me and it was SO refreshing. – the water, the letting go, the moving on. I’m not abandoning my health goals – some weight loss, more exercise, better eating habits. But I’m done beating myself up and missing out on some of the real pleasures in life, like enjoying the water on a hot summer day.

What.. you thought I’d give you the full body shot? Not.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch… I made a BIG decision and it feels right.

Till soon, friends –

Grab the Coffee and donuts

First up – WordPress vs. Blogger – any advice? What’s your experience? As a creative person, I know Blogger is limited, but I’m used to it. And Blogger is Free… that’s kinda nice. But did you know… Blogger is owned by Google.. and that means your content is owned by Google… and at any time whatsoever, they can just turn it off, be rid of it, bye bye. That means your blog and it’s contents. Gone. *sigh… did not know that, kinda defeats the purpose of being a log for you, your friends and family over the long haul.

Wordpress is more “technical”.. not as easy at first, needs some patience, of which I am in short supply, always..just my nature. And.. it’s not free. If I understand correctly, the most basic costs about $100. a year. If that’s all I’d have to spend on it, it’s worth it to OWN your content and know it is not going to be erased by parent company. However, their security isn’t as high (google has much bigger security program) , bigger chance of hack with WordPress. Then there’s the tricky issue of transferring your blog to WordPress… not easy from what I have read. Can any of you tell me your experience? I think a few of my blog friends use WordPress.

*warning – If you didn’t know already, I curse sometimes. Blame it on my NY upbringing, except the rest of my family isn’t afflicted. I know it’s not ladylike, but for me it fills the need, underscores the offense in the way I need to express it, a little satisfaction when talking about a less than satisfying situation, like a quick punch in the gut. Since I hate physical violence, the curse word does the job.

Next…how about B*ll O’Re*lly being fired from F@x!.. Ha!… Nothing turns me off more than an arrogant holier than thou a$$h*le, couldn’t have happened to a better guy – don’t let the door hit ya! But let’s be honest, he’s being let go because of multiple sexual harassment issues – and F@x didn’t fire him until sponsors started dropping like flies. He also got a hefty 25 mil golden parachute… so they lose points there. It wasn’t their ethics that took him down. No.. once again.. money. I do feel at least the vernal pools at the edges of the swamp are beginning to drain. There’s that.

Speaking of the swamp, how many flagrant outright lies, hypocricies, conflicts of interest,outright abuses of his priviledges and incompetencies is Agent Orange going to get away with before we collectively say ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. If you’re still proud of your new POTUS, I have to hand it to you, you’re able to overlook an awful lot for the sake of the “agenda”… although.. does anyone really understand the Agenda? If you do, please explain it to 45, because clearly, it’s lost on him. Never in the history of EVER has there been a POTUS who flubbed, lied, mispoke, lied, abused his power, lied… and still had a base unwilling to acknowledge ANY of it. So.. freak’n… strange, this acceptance or ignoring of the obvious ills. SO strange. It’s no longer about left vs. right. Morals vs none is more like it. And his tweets? Honestly….. on some level 45 is mentally ill. No other explanation for it.

On a health note – Because I had some worrisome symptoms I went through a bunch of tests recently and thankfully all turned out well. Just minor annoyances of menopause , which I have apparently hit full steam ahead. My advice here – get the health screenings regularly. Don’t skip them, they are important… especially as we age. I turned 52 and my body said.. OK girl, time to throw some sh*t at you, just a reminder you’re no spring chicken.

Sleep is still currently an issue for me – if I get five hours all in a row, it’s a good night. My fibromyalgia reminds me on a daily basis that’s not enough sleep, so I am trying to find methods for getting more of it. Currently my fibro doc has me on melatonin, and my OBGYN has put me on low dose of estradiol and progesterone. In the long term these things aren’t great – they up your cancer risk. But to get me back on the right track they want me to try them short term. They had me try a low dose of antidepressants as a sleep aid, didn’t work. I already employ good sleep habits, I read before bed, I don’t eat shortly before turning in, no caffeine, we go to bed at a decent time, always have been up before dawn but that’s not the issue. I fall asleep without a problem, but staying asleep is another story…. have you had any of these struggles? and what have you tried that actually works? Things like Advil PM don’t have much effect, and you don’t really want to get into a pill taking habit either. I can knock myself out with Benadryl, but I am a zombie the next day.

As for our current weight loss goals – the Mr. and I started Nutrisystem in January and he has lost 45 pounds – I kid you not. The program works if you stick with it, strictly. He looks and feels so much better. So why didn’t I stay on it? It’s full of prepackaged food, not all of it healthy – snacks are oreo type cookies, chocolate cupcakes, meals include pasta, rice, sodium, sodium. Sounds unlikely, right? It’s the portions that make the diet work. I just really want to eat real, fresh, whole foods – so … I quit it. I have not yet lost the 15 lbs I want to lose. Now that I know I’m not dying and I can push myself with the exercise, I have started the weight loss goals again, let’s see where I get by summer. One thing I did learn through nutrisystem is… it’s all about calorie intake – and .. PORTIONS.

Last but definitely not least… my boy, my baby, my youngest child, has turned 21. Oh, how time flies….

The family spent Easter giving a large donation to the Tribe at Mohegan Sun – a delicious buffet lunch and then some obsessive lever pulling, button punching slot machine worship ensued. I think half the state of Connecticut was in attendance as well.

I love this boy beyond measure, he is kind, considerate, appreciative, inquisitive, and just as stubborn and thick headed as his mother….but thankfully he has not picked up my tendency toward profanity. I’m also very grateful for this extended family of ours – we are so very lucky to live near each other, to be able to spend time together, to recognize the value of doing so. – It’s all good.