My cousin Ric was a handsome guy – rock star looks with out the snarly. Even better -he was a kind hearted old soul with an ear for music – a drummer and sometimes singer who’s potential was never realized. Unfortunately, his constant companion throughout his adult life was alcoholism. He tried many times to kick it to the curb, but it kicked right back and the last time…the curb took his life. How ironic.
I didn’t see him often, as he always lived states away, but when I did, I adored him… with his rock star good looks and his musical ability and that big heart and smile that brought you right into his circle when you were near. He had the same twinkle in his eye as his father, brothers and sister… and I think a little of the depression that plagued his beautiful mothers soul.
I remember the last conversation we had in my mothers kitchen… he was in a bad place, struggling so hard to come back to “normal”. He had two beautiful kids and a granddaughter who he loved very much. He wanted so much to stay healthy and sober so he could spend more time with them. I was giving him all the advice a person who’s never been in his shoes would typically say, and I feel stupid now thinking I had any answers for him. I didn’t have a clue as to what he was really up against.
My cousin, who is a gifted writer and was once a ballerina – wrote a moving tribute yesterday on her blog about her brother. This had to be a very painful process for her. They were a close family all their lives despite hardships – and there have been many. Until reading this post, I didn’t quite know what Rics last days on this earth looked like and it breaks my heart in two. He deserved better.
http://augustinesconfessions.blogspot.com/
l to r – My sister, Ric’s brother and wife, my Nana in purple – and behind her my little guy on the shoulder of my big guy along with baby niece “S”, Ric’s sister in pale blue with husband behind her and Ric on the right.
So much has changed since I took this picture.
