It’s here again… and is it me or does Shark Week seem to be growing.. to like, a month long festival..just to torment me.
My fear was first ignited with the 1975 movie JAWS.. which was hideously irresistable to my friends and I in the midst of our glorious adolescense. (Sort of like The Exorcist, but we won’t even go there…) Back in the day, the book was considered risque due to the skinny dip scene and the resulting ravaged and naked torso of the unfortunate young woman who’s hand was found sticking up out of the sand in the opening scenes.
The three mechanical sharks used in the first Jaws movie were named Bruce
… after Steven Speilberg’s lawyer. It never occurred to me while I watched that movie again and again…that the shark was fake.
My family and I vacation on Martha’s Vineyard when we can get there, and every time we visit, we stop at the Shark bridge and watch the young people jump off into the cool blue waters. I’m a swimmer. I’de like to do this myself!… but.. I.. just..can’t. It’s where the film was shot, you know. Bruce might still come for revenge..they didn’t kill him in one, two or three…and I didn’t have the guts to see four.
Some things you may not know about Sharks:
* They’ve been around for about 400 million years – long before dinosaurs even existed.”
I can appreciate their resilience, really!.. but I think I’d rather live with dinosaurs. At least we know how to wipe them out. Just sayin.
“Sharks have the most powerful jaws on the planet.”
Wonderful.
“Sharks never run out of teeth – when one is lost another spins forward from the rows of backup teeth.”
I think Newt Gingrich has the same affliction.
“A shark may use over 20,000 teeth during its life.”
On unsuspecting surfers, divers, small boat operators, swimmers and those poor harbor seals, I’m sure.
Now, what got me going on this tangent, you might ask?
THIS VIDEO.. of a crazy surfer dude who decided to go back out after he had already escaped the damn things… and film them. Alone. If I were there at that moment, I’de die of an instant panic attack, an easy lunch for Bruce.
Check out this great MSN Video: Surfer Encounters Sharks
THIS JUST IN: Mark of Marks Rants and Raves gave me this little bit of pertinent information:
“Falling coconuts kill 150 people worldwide each year, 15 times the number of fatalities attributable to sharks,” said George Burgess, Director of the University of Florida’s International Shark Attack File and a noted shark researcher. “The reality is that, on the list of potential dangers encountered in aquatic recreation, sharks are right at the bottom of the list. ”
So..while you THINK you’re safe under the palm trees in your comfy beach chair, far from the terrors of the Great White Grip… there just might be a killer coconut dangling overhead….
I’ll take my chances with the nut, thank you.
