We Shall Be Free

 

As these elections come and go I find I am at a loss for words that adequately describe my heartbreak for the state of the world and this country that I love. And as I see politicians who continuously sow seeds of division and hate and people/media/politicans continue to spread false information with the intention to divide and conquer… I don’t know how it’s lost on anyone this very simple but very real truth….. united we stand, divided we will eventually fall.  We are falling.  We need leaders who are focused on bringing us all together regardless of our affiliations, for that is where we become strong…… leaders who believe in democracy at it’s best, leaders who truly care about all of us, not just those who bow to them or line their pockets. We need leaders who care about the earth because we are fucking it up royally and that’s not a bottomless pit, we need leaders who’s egos don’t get in the way of the job they’re supposed to do… for all of us, not just their rally crowds. I don’t like most of my choices for voting, I wish we did better across the whole political spectrum. And I sure as hell don’t have the answer – but I will not lose any more of my precious time fretting over something I have no control over other than my vote. I will continue to try to leave things better than I found them, help those I can, and although I’m not religious, this country and it’s people are gonna need every prayer we’ve got, because all I see is more ugly coming down the pike, and too many people looking the other way to support it for whatever their reasons. Unfathomable, and yet here we are.

I wrote this a week or so ago, just before the most recent elections….. and what I see now  is HOPE.   A LIGHT beaming out over the dysfunction.  I still believe a mix of both Democratic and Republican policy make for a strong Democracy if the two parties can work together for the common good.  There in lies the rub!  There has always been friction,  and some corruption all over the spectrum, but never the divisive vicious manipulating  anything goes and anything is accepted crap  we have seen ushered in with the MAGA mentality.  It’s as if someone threw gas on and lit and aimed a blowtorch at the worst our society has to offer.

…. So.. that light?    This election was not a red wave, as the media predicted.  A ripple at best.  And some of the MAGA crowd vying for power was sent a clear message – we are tired of the hate, of the rage politics, we want function, not dysfunction.

Trying to distance myself from the muck of the political landscape… I’ve been sitting at the easel again and just finished this little painting, which I truly love.  For me it represents simpler times, and a childhood joy I still cherish… those little glass orbs, tiny little worlds in a glass jar on a sunny windowsill. PS: I don’t know why the weird lines appear in this painting’s image here, at least on my computer screen.  It’s not in the uploaded image of the painting.

As I sat up there on election day  in my son’s old bedroom which is now my “art studio” … I had Amazon music playing and my old buddy Garth came up  – how profound is this…. ( yep, I’m still hearing impaired, but I remember my favorites and all their nuances… and I can still hear the base rhythm… so believe it or not, I can still sing – horribly!!)   Garth Brooks is one of my very favorites… and this song ranks up there in my top 10 of all time.

 

We Shall Be Free

This ain’t comin’ from no prophet,
Just an ordinary man.
When I close my eyes,
I see the way this world shall be
When we all walk hand in hand.
When the last child cries for a crust of bread,
When the last man dies for just words that he said,
When there’s shelter over the poorest head,
We shall be free.
When the last thing we notice is the color of the skin,
And the first thing we look for is the beauty within;
When the skies and the oceans are clean again,
Then we shall be free.
We shall be free, we shall be free.
Stand straight, walk proud,
‘Cause we shall be free.
When we’re free to love anyone we choose,
When this world’s big enough for all different views,
When we all can worship from our own kind of pew,
Then we shall be free.
We shall be free, we shall be free
Have a little faith, hold out,
‘Cause we shall be free.
And when money talks for the very last time,
And nobody walks a step behind;
When there’s only one race,
And that’s mankind, then we shall be free.
We shall be free ,we shall be free
Stand straight, (walk proud, )
Have a little faith, (hold out;)
We shall be free.
We shall be free, we shall be free,
(Stand straight, ) stand straight,
(Have a little faith, ) walk proud,
‘Cause we shall be free.

 

Till soon, Friends…

 

33

 

My oldest baby is 33 years old today.  Holy cow, time flies.  She has overcome and continues to wrestle with an obstacle no one sees or can fully understand (TBI from car accident many moons ago) and she THRIVES regardless – building a beautiful life for herself and her little family as she goes.  Cheers to many more years and many more good things to come 🥂🍾❤🌻🧁

Meanwhile… back at the ranch, can you stand a few more fall pictures?  New England at her finest – and I just keep saying to myself as I walk the fields and woods, drive the country roads.. man, there just has not been a more glorious fall in all the years I can remember.  I see from your comments in the previous post you are finding the same where you live.

Leah and Max enjoying the glorious weather

The barn project continues… we are trying to get it all done before the snow flies this winter…. oh how I hope this comes to fruition because right now with the horses in temporary housing on the hill and the turn out routine,  feed supplies and mucking tools scattered.. it’s more work and my neck and shoulders are bitching.

My son’s dog Leo loves going to work with “dad”.

 

And below.. the old barn gutted… to be rehabbed into the new.

There is more good news hopefully on the horizon, but I can’t yet share it out of an abundance of caution.  What I can say is, living with fibromyalgia as I have for many years, I have learned some of the triggers for a flare, and one of the big ones is stress and worry.  And Lord, I am a worrier.  I haven’t yet discovered how to loosen that thread from the fabric I am made of.  But this mantra helps remind me when a new “worry” arrives …. there’s even a magnet on my fridge with these words……

    Easier said than done, I know it.  But in my older years I am trying to let go of some of the old habits that don’t serve me well.  This is one of them. Let go or be dragged.     I know you know the woe.    Another is losing that extra 20 or so pounds I really really hate dragging around.  It doesn’t sound like a huge problem, but mentally it drags me and on this small frame, physically too.  Bleh.   I’ve tried various things, and I am very active.  What it really comes down to is stress and worry eating… and I love to cook for the people I love (which includes me, lol).

And you know, I really do like me and it took me far too long to realize this.  Why does it take us so long to arrive at that destination?  Think of all the problems it would solve if we were born and grew up liking/LOVING! ourselves and knowing our worth.

Wishing you all good things, and thank you for stopping in.

A Glorious Fall

Oh how I love this season!  I don’t really have a favorite season, do you?  There is something magical in each, if you ask my two cents worth.  This particular fall is one of the most glorious I have witnessed so far. The summer’s long dry spell and the sudden onslaught of heavy rains for days must be the right combination of “stuff” to make the leaves turn magical here in New England.  The colors are just extraordinary!  How is it looking in your neck of the woods?   The Mr. and I took a ride this weekend to one of our favorite spots after picking up sandwiches at a nearby deli… and I snapped some pictures along the way.  Just.. So… Gorgeous.

Here on the farm, we’ve been working on some projects.. replacing rotted fencing… it’s been TWELVE YEARS since we renovated and moved into this old farm house and property and the split rail needs replacing.  Holy cow, time flies, friends.    So far we’ve managed the dog yard, which is a pretty big area.  AND, we’ve installed a gate at the driveway entrance because Google maps or whatever alien life designates the streets on those things has decided our driveway is a road to somewhere else.  And it is not.  And then the drivers get annoyed because they aren’t getting where the map tells them they should be as we wave them down and tell them to SLOW DOWN and  please go back to the road because they’re on private property.  Which annoys them.  Imagine!   Hence.. the gate.

We’re also giving the horse barn a big facelift!  In our 35-ish years together, M and I have had four farms, built four homes and four barns.  When we took on This Old House I thought we would be winding down the livestock part of our farm endeavor, so we built a relatively small barn for the horses.  Then came the goats.  And the Chickens.  And another horse.. or two.  With those critters came their small outbuildings.  And in winter, when the snow flies and accumulates, let me tell you… … it’s a lot of work shoveling and moving hay and grain and shavings and water to where it needs to go, and this Mother Hen is no spring chicken.  *ahem.    So.. the new barn is being added on to the old structure and will be much more efficient than the current system we’ve had.  All those outbuildings have a new home with another chicken farmer.

In other news, my daughter just got engaged! These two live right next door and we are thrilled for their happiness!

With the evenings longer and more time spent indoors, I’ve been finding some time to read again for pleasure.  Gladys Taber is an author of years gone by, and one of my very favorites. I have at least seven of her books pertaining to her beloved Stillmeadow Farm in Southbury, CT and whenever I need a reprieve from the larger world and it’s “heavy”, I pick up a Still meadow book and read, and relax into her world of  grace, peace and country sensibility.  It’s like watching  that old movie, White Christmas with Bing Crosby et al.  Her books are no longer in print, but they are still found in old book stores, online and if you’re really lucky, while hunting through someone else’s discarded treasures.

I hope this finds you well and contented, and if you’re so inclined, let me know how things are going with you and yours!

Till soon –

 

Showing Up

The drought this year has been brutal, hasn’t it?  Our lawns are literally crunchy. Of course this was the summer we decided to tame our back yard garden, tossing what got way too large for it’s space, planting many new perennials and a few  flowering cherry trees.  So, that’s meant watering watering watering,  we are thankful for a very good well here on the farm.  Down at Stella by the Sea, we gave up on any ideas of green grass. I have managed to keep the potted geraniums and sweet potato vine alive and the tomatoes from that little garden have been heavenly.  Up here on the farm, the yield has been.. meh.  And it’s already spent.

Stella tomatoes…

A Stella Sunset taken last night by another photographer with a drone at extreme low tide… where you can walk across the entire cove without getting your waist wet.  The water rises about six feet at high tide, so the boats that use our cove have to navigate when they should  come and go.

Miss Molly is doing very well here with us, she and Lacey are definitely a team now, and she continues to astound us with her navigation abilities.  She knows our voices and whinnies when we come to the barn at feed time, she knows where the gate is and comes right to it to be led in to their stall.  When she wants to find Lacey in their paddock she stands still and listens for the bell tied in lacey’s mane, and walks right over to her, as if she had sight.  It truly, truly amazing.

More wedding photos, the photog versions have arrived….. Indeed the whole darn lot of us had some good old fashioned fun ✨

Mom and my son…. (she was the JP)

Cousins, Me, Sister, Niece 💕

 

Boyz to Men   –  They all grew up together, went to school together, played sports together, and two have joined the group by becoming family… I just love this photo for so many reasons.

The night goes so fast, as they always do when you’re having fun.  It was something we all needed, and we all cut loose.  It’s times like these that remind us how it feels to be really alive, all in, enjoying each other’s company, casting worries and stress aside.    We definitely showed up.  When you get the chance… take it.

Leaving you with these wise words right here… I am ALL ABOUT THIS from here on out…  So done with the self criticisms, I am so grateful to be here to experience the whole process.    We’re winning, friends….  every single blessed day… we are winning.

 

Till soon, friends…

 

Molly & Lacey

Welcome Molly to the M Family Farm!
Molly was rescued  last year from an out of state auction that shall remain unnamed. She had severe uveitis (eye inflammation) that had been left untreated by previous owner and she was obese. The auction was running her through as pregnant ( with a stud colt!) and about 10 years old. They get more money for them that way, but it  was all lies … The rescue woman extraordinaire saw her suffering , bought her and brought her home to care for her. After extensive attempts, her eyes could not be saved but Miss Molly has shown the world she is just fine as she is- she has been here for two days and is already navigating her paddock with Lacey just fine, it’s amazing, almost unbelievable, and we love her so much already. Lacey approves too, she’s wearing a small bell which I have braided  into her mane that tells Molly where she is. …. it’s a beautiful thing.
I hope all is well in your world.  Lord knows if you follow any media it looks like the world has gone to hell in a handbasket and there’s plenty to back that up… however, there is so much good and so much beauty and so much inspiration if we only seek it, and most often it’s there right in front of our eyes, sometimes in the smallest of ways and in the every day.   Believe it.
Sharing a Black Magic Chocolate Cake recipe here with you, I plan to try it soon, but it looks divine!

Grow where you’re planted

Our garden is thriving, and I have to be upfront and say we don’t do all this work by ourselves here in this big plot – we have help from our construction crew – when work load is slow they help in the garden.

Last night I went shopping for dinner up on the hill behind the house, pulled potatoes and onions right out of the ground,  it’s a beautiful thing…

 

I made some triple berry jam, throwing some store bought strawberries in with our blueberries and raspberries…

and made my Grandmother Elsie’s BBQ sauce…  she  was an outstanding cook and made some fancy dishes including an incredible roast with dumplings and gravy I have yet to duplicate  and her pies were legendary- but one of my favorites was her bbq ribs – and her recipe for sauce came off the back of a dominos brown sugar box. It’s soooo yum.  The  ribs are first baked for an hour at 400 in Coca Cola – then drain the coke and smother with bbq sauce- bake for another half hour till ribs are looking perfectly saucy baked . This sauce can be used on chicken, burgers, even hotdogs !

I grew up on Staten Island where most of us had postage stamp sized yards …. across the street from an old Italian named Joe. He had the most magnificent tiny garden and each summer he would let me come over and pick a few of the best tomatoes for our family. We would save a few for my grandfather, who thought a good garden tomato was food worthy of the Gods and he wasn’t wrong. Joe would also let me eat the peppers right off the plant because that’s how I loved them most, before they were fried or roasted.
It doesn’t escape me for one minute, how fortunate we are to farm this land. What a treasure it is to harvest dinner from our own hill. If you’re not already doing it, I honestly believe it’s one of the best things you can do for yourself- and it can be a container garden on your deck or herbs on a window sill , you don’t need acreage. It just feels so good to stick hands in dirt, tend plants, reap the rewards- and gives children a quality lesson and skill that’s never wasted in life.
 Think about it… reap what you sow, grow where you are planted, …
Life is like a garden, you reap what you sow… from your own fertile soils, your seedlings do grow ✨

Grab a Cup o’Joe, this is a rambler

So much awful news out there, but as I get older (and older) I’m trying to teach myself the necessary art of looking away.  I really need to, because I literally feel every agony others are afflicted with, the unfairness of it all, the evils and utter bullshit of the world if I let myself dwell.  And then the anger finds a home and settles.   I’m airing it out and letting it go as often as I possibly can nowadays and it feels… freeing.  Politics?  Fuck’em.  I’ll vote, but I’m staying out of the fray because it makes not one fuck of a difference whether I let it stir me up or I focus on more worthy endeavors –  things that actually help others and myself.  Onward.

The boy child is getting married in five weeks!!  We’ve had fun helping the bride plan All The Things, the groom occasionally nods yes or no and made one phone call for party bus service and a trip to the tux rental with his buddies.   The men have it so easy in this department, you know.   We love our daughter in law to be, they’ve been together 8 or so years and she’s really been a part of our family for quite a while now.  Cheers to many happy years!

It’s opening season for Stella by the Sea – the lawn has been mowed several times already, pots filled with geraniums, little garden plot has tomatoes, basil and parsley,  bedding washed, pillows sunned/aired out, refridge restocked, floors washed, bathroom cleaned,  windows cleaned – kayak back out on the wall – we’re ready!   Why.. when we have a big  vegetable garden at home, do we plant one at Stella?…. because it just  always feels to me like a plot of soil needs a patch of garden, no matter how tiny.  If I had an apartment in the city, I’d have plants in the windowsills. But my soul would wither there, I do believe.

Photo courtesy Ben Kuropat and his  drone – he takes amazing photos of our cove.  Out in the distance are the Thimble Islands – Stella is in the little heart outline.

The geese have been marching their babies up and down the cottage community road as they switch from the marsh to the cove, back and forth.

This year for the first time I have seen what appears to be a juvenile Lion’s mane jellyfish – a bit pale in color but behaving robustly, inspecting the oyster beds in front of Stella.  Notice the much smaller variety in the bottom of the picture – there are many in the water this year.

Meanwhile, back on the farm – everything’s blooming! Have you found that all flowering things are extremely lush this year?  The lilacs here in New England are absolutely beautiful.  The wild violets carpet the forest floor, even the daffodils where planted seem to have multiplied heartily.  Our garden up on the hill is planted – the Mr. went overboard with potatoes but.. plenty to give away, right?  Every year we discuss shrinking the garden because it’s a lot of work and so much is given away. We shrink it initially – but somehow it balloons back out.  This picture was taken last week.  Since then, tomatoes, cucumbers, squash, eggplant, oregano have been planted where the ground is bare here and the leaves have unfurled more on the trees.

The goat girls, horses, chickens and dogs  are thriving, all give us hours of work but definitely also the pleasures and therapy  that only animals can bring to our lives.  We nurture them, they nurture our souls.

Kai’s 1 year adoption day anniversary was May 15th – we’ve come a long way in that year.  Kai has gotten me out on the trails again, getting great exercise and building a trusting relationship with him.  He’s gone from practically feral to a wonderful companion – sleeps between the Mr. and I on the bed even – it’s all good.  I find adopting rescues so very rewarding, even when initially very trying.

 

Then….

Now….

The girl child and her guy are enjoying their home nextdoor and we love having everyone on the outskirts of the farm.  Chores are shared,  meals are shared, garden produce and eggs distributed.  We respect each other’s privacy and have managed not to get on each other’s last nerve, it’s truly a blessing.  My son and fiance are just over the hill.

My newest painting on the easel is a simple thing, marbles in a mason jar on a window sill.  Still much to get done here,  what a lesson in patience this is.  I’m learning as I go, and I make plenty of mistakes, but the therapy of art is a beautiful thing and doesn’t cost much at all.   I’ve always loved marbles and  glass in all it’s forms of art. I  have an extensive glass art collection I’ll post one of these days.

Trying to slim down a bit for the gown I will wear to my son’s wedding, I’ve been making some lighter, healthier recipes lately.  Here’s one that was a big hit, so delicious… give it a try if you like quiche – farm fresh eggs make it even better.

Onion Mushroom, Squash Gruyere Quiche
Sauté onions in butter till becoming translucent , then throw in mushrooms and yellow squash and sauté till their liquids are in the pan and they’re softened- throw in herbs of your choice- parsley thyme and basil here, salt and pepper, 3 tablespoons white wine- simmer down till liquid is almost gone- Remove from heat. Meanwhile mix together four eggs, 3/4 cup heavy cream, 1 cup grated Gruyere, salt and pepper- place onion mushroom yellow squash mixture in either a prepared crust or go crustless, as I did here. Then pour egg/cream,cheese mixture over it- bake at 350° for 35-ish minutes till done. Yum!

Ending this post with a few words of inspiration below – wishing you well, and thank you for stopping by my little corner of the world.

Till soon –

 

Will they rise, will we…

How are you digesting all that awful information out there, is it weighing heavy as it is with me?  I just cannot fathom the depths of evil pooled in a man like P*tin and the mentality of  those who willingly follow his lead.  How do you march and drive and fly and angle your weapon into a peaceable country and start obliterating innocent people and all the things they have built and lived in and loved,  and live with yourself afterward. How do you admire the man who tells you to do so?    And how does that evil man think he can ever gain whatever little thread of respect he had in this world, now that he has proven himself to be another version of H*tler.   He is destroying his own country along with his decimation of Ukran*an cities, how did he ever believe this would be a big win for him?

Why such evil exists in a world where we could truly all live in harmony and without basic need if we would all just rise to that simple concept… is beyond my comprehension.  It would be so easy.  How did we evolve into something so different.  Well…. some of us.    This is where the concept of an all seeing, all loving, all knowing, all powerful Creator fails me.  It feels more like we were an experiment that is failing, rapidly.   Or was he/she/they like the surgeon who’s intent is to save a life but  nicks a main artery in the process and we slowly bleed out.  If you find comfort in religion, my intent is not to mock your beliefs.  I just don’t see it, with all my heart I don’t feel it.  I believe more in the power of good people and I pray for that most of all.

I am so impressed by the tenacity, the raw courage of the Leader and people of Ukra*ne.  I hope they prevail, I hope they will be able to return to their country and rebuild, despite the destruction, and I hope we all live to see it.  My prayers for them are simple.. I am a spiritual person, if not religious.  I pray they rise like a phoenix from the ashes and overcome the monster’s attempted extermination.  And I pray this country gets it’s shit together and finds more unity among us, rising from the ashes of the political discourse that is also so.. unnecessary.  Don’t we all want the same basic things?  We do, if you don’t fall for the talking heads with their own agendas.

I have one tattoo on my 57 year old body – and it is the phoenix, it is my prayer.

 

 

 

 

From Karen’s Mother

For those of you looking for a little light in this dark hour, may I suggest a book my book club is discussing this month, “The Day the World Came to Town” by Jim DeFede. It is not new, twenty years old in fact, but just as relevant as it was on the day it was published, maybe more so. It is a reminder of what we can be when we embrace with grace and goodwill our shared humanity.

Compiled from interviews, this slim paperback describes the events in Newfoundland that followed the detouring of 38 international flights to the Gander airport on 9/11/01. Into a town of 10,000, planes arrived with a total of 6,595 passengers and crew. Among them were people from Moldova, Africa, Germany, two adopted babies from Kazakhstan, a New York couple worried about their firefighter son.

The outpouring of goodwill from the native Newfoundlanders was boundless. People, individually and through their organizations, offered shelter, clothes, showers, medicines, toys for kids, and hot meals to weary passengers. Luggage had to be left on board planes and no one was allowed off until security measures had been taken. It was hours before most of them knew what had happened in New York, Pennsylvania and D.C.

Even before passengers had disembarked, the townspeople had organized the logistics for shelter and food without skipping a beat. They were not only generous, they were smart and thorough in their planning and gathering of resources. “For the better part of a week, nearly every man, woman, and child in Gander and the surrounding smaller towns… stopped what they were doing so they could help. They placed their lives on hold for a group of strangers and asked for nothing in return.” writes DeFede in his introduction.

I had to smile when I got to page 64 and read “The Gander Lions Club has forty-seven members and a building it shares with the local senior citizens’ group…Pulling up to the Lions Club, the buses were greeted by a dozen people all waving and smiling and calling out, “How she going’, buddy?” The stranded passengers in those buses were given a place to sleep, food to eat, and their first look at a TV and the news from the States. Here was another group of Lions like our own in Killingworth, in another country, following the same motto, “We serve!”

The information on the history of Newfoundland, its people, and that of Gander airport, though brief, is interesting and relevant to the events of the week. But it is the authenticity and generosity of its people that will not soon leave you. Perhaps one of their favorite songs says it best:

Raise your glass and drink with me to that island in the sea

Where friendship is a word they understand.

You will never be alone when

you’re in a Newfie’s home,

There’s no price tag on the doors in Newfoundland.

There will always be a chair at the table for you there,

They will share what they have with any man.

You don’t have to worry friend if your pocket is thin,

There’s no price tag on the doors in Newfoundland.

And for five days in September of 2001 they proved it. (A popular Broadway musical, “Come from Away” is about the same events.)