Tag: Family

A semi formal Conversation

   She stormed up the hill to where I was parked on campus.  A night of shopping and eating were planned, as the college girl has a semi formal to attend next week.  I knew from the fierceness of the gait there was something not quite right.

  Driving in the rain, silence..and stairing at text on other appendage iphone.  Do I dare wade into the dark and treacherous waters of young adult angst?

Me:  So, do you want to look at dresses first or eat?

CG:  I don’t care, whatever.

Me:  uh-huh…. um, something wrong?

CG:  Mom, I really don’t want to talk about it.  As a matter of fact, I appreciate that you drove up here, but I really don’t even want to go shopping… or eat. 

Me:  Really?  But this morning you were fine with it.  What happened?

CG:  Everything happened, OK?  Nothing happened, actually.  It’s just stupid..and I’m not telling you everything, so don’t even bother.

This is how the evening started, but it ended in a better place… atleast from where I was sitting.

We did find a pretty black cocktail dress….
I survived a few snide remarks and
she survived  a few disapproving glances

We both drooled over shoes…
Dinner at Texas Longhorn
While we were waiting for our table..
I found it utterly hilarious that everyone else who were waiting for tables
were staring at their cell phones. Everyone else.
Fiance of ghost of  boyfriend past happened to be waitressing too…
Really, Universe??
The food was great, although I did most of the eating.
The Sonoma Salad was awesome…
There were flurries of  furious texting…..

   I still find it strange and a bit sad that people do important things via text…. like fighting or breaking up or making up or reprimanding or … well…. any thing that would be much better represented face to face.  That can’t be a good trend for the future of humanity.

   I try to keep my opinion to myself, not one of my strong points.  I remember those days so clearly.  When it came to matters of the heart, did I want to hear the voice of reason?  Would it have made a difference in the outcome?  Probably not.  No… definitely not.

   It’s ironic that we eventually have the knowledge that sure would have helped when we were younger and making important decisions about the future.  I want my kids to benefit from things I learned through my own mistakes, but it doesn’t often work that way.

 Bottom line is… they still have to find their own way,
and sometimes we have to just
let..it..be.
Easier said than done. 

This is my Religion

 I try to stay away from religious and political posts, mainly because those subjects are riddled with landmines and tend to attract the crazies. I don’t like to offend people either – I don’t believe my views should be yours too.  Today’s post is an exception.

 I was raised a Catholic, as were my parents and their parents. While I have the education and the rites of passage,  I believe something a little different than what I was taught.  I would say I am a spiritual person, but I am not religious.  I see much hypocrisy and I don’t believe in a fear-based structure, which is prevalent in religious history.  I did give my children the opportunity to grow up in the Catholic community so that they could make decisions for themselves, untainted by my feelings on the matter. I think that’s only fair.

 Last night at my son and nephew’s confirmation ceremony, I saw and felt and was drawn to the reason people go to church on Sunday.  Families together, an uplifting sermon, music that soothed the soul. There were tears in my eyes  as my sister and son, nephew and  uncle stood before the Priest during the anointing.

Souls together under one roof, taking comfort in each others presence, rejoicing. Now there’s a religion I can abide. If only it were all about that.

 

Greenhouse Project

   Our rising Son is at that age where he knows everything, and everything you think you know is stupid.   (enter my mother, chuckling at the irony…paybacks, apples not falling far from the tree, surely you remember when..….)   The problem is, I remember all too clearly!…

We forced him to tag along with us on errands yesterday and I noticed while having lunch at Chilis, I think rather than be seen with his parents he would have evaporated into the upholstery of the booth if he could have found a way.

  So this morning when he said  “Dad, remember we talked about the greenhouse, want to build it together today?”… you know… my heart kinda skipped a beat or two.  The moon will surely be blue tonight, I’ll have to remember to look. 

Randomest Post Ever

 The Coop came yesterday! … We decided rather than kill each other attempt to build the coop ourselves, what they were offering at chickensforbackyards was reasonably priced, so we bought one from them.  It’s perfect for our eight-chicken needs.

 
Plenty of nesting box room and the interior is roomy with perches too.
 

 Initially I wanted the coop on the other side of the garden shed behind the house… you can see it off in the distance here..  However, Mike got a bit of information from one of his farm buddies that rats are attracted to chicken feed, and next thing I know, the coop is on the other side of the barn/garage.  …..Chicken.

 These are the chicken yard panels and green roof, next thing on the to-do list.
We’ll be able to run power from the back of the garage to the coop.

  Unrelated! ….I’ve said earlier that I’m a half-breed, and what I meant by that was I’m half Italian and half Irish-German.  Yes, that’s a nationality because I said so.   I was born a few minutes after midnight of St. Patricks Day…  not quite a leprechaun.  So today a dear friend came by to see This Old House bearing house warming and birthday gifts.  She fortified my kitchen chicken collection (say that three times fast) with these adorable things…

 ..a beautiful Rooster cookie jar!

                                                
                                                      and this hand stitched piece in a frame…

..and a beautiful dishtowel and spoon rest I didn’t photograph.
This is the tray on the wall above the sink… see that sign below it?
…. that about says it all.

 

 She handstitched this beautiful chicken out of old quilt material too…

H has been one of my horse buddies for many years and it doesn’t matter
 how long the span of time in between visits… we always pick up right where we left off
and there is never enough time to cover all the things we want to catch up on.
Thanks, H.  –  Now lets find some new trails to blaze.
Totally unrelated again…(I warned you this was random)
 The manchild saw me taking pictures of my orea stuffed cookies and said
“Ma…. get a shot of THIS..”
Just six months ago, he was still a twig. A stick figure! MAH  BAYBEE  BOY.
As he likes to say now, while flexing a bicep…
“BOOM”
*sigh*
 My midsection is saying the same thing.
As T-shirt weather approaches, I am thoroughly disgusted with my eating habits.
Time to get off my arse and start working it.
 After this last batch of cookies is gone.

 

Louie

 Mike and I come from Italian stock (I’m a half-breed to be honest) , and as is typical of our history, our grandparents were avid gardeners. It was a means to feed their family, not just the hobby we nurture today.  Mikes grandfather had a fruit and vegetable stand in West Haven.  He remembers rows and rows of plants in the garage and out in the yard behind the store, and the scolding he’d get if he put too many potatoes in what was supposed to be a 5 lb. bag to be sold in the store.

 Grandpa Al in his shop

  My grandfather grew roses and tomatoes and peppers and there were fig,  cherry and loganberry trees in his back yard on Staten Island. I remember harvest days when we would climb ladders and drop fruits onto tarps from the trees.  I also remember being scared beyond  silly in my grandparents presence. They were a stern lot, speaking broken English and  always, in my eight year old point of view, so serious.   Occasionally  they’d take a giant Hershey Bar out of a drawer in the kitchen and give each of us a big chunk of chocolate.

      Mike decided about five years ago he wanted to learn the art of gardening with the traditions and methods our ancestors used.  Our grandparents are long since gone… however LOUIE… Louie Louie.. is still alive and kicking it up in his magnificent garden in Middleltown.  Louie was a sheetrocker in the building business for many years. This is how Mike came to know him.   He is also an italian immigrant and fantastical gardener. That man works wonders in the soil of the small plot of land next to his house.  He also raises and kills rabbits for food, the reason I sometimes despise him… but in fairness he has let me buy two in recent years so that I could save them from his dinner table.   One of those rescue rabbits died at the paws of my barn cat… ask me how awful I felt that day. No don’t.  It’s still awful.  (I’m sorry, Sonny.. I failed you.)

  ANYWAY… Louie is tight-lipped with his gardening secrets. You cannot ask him direct questions, he will not give a direct answer. In a heavy italian accent you can imagine this line …”  Oooooh, you wanna know, huh?…..eeee hee heee…. well, I notta gonna tell ya”.     Mike has learned that he needs to just walk with him in the garden as he does his thing, and  it is there that Louie starts to talk.  In the talking, he gives away little bits of information, especially when he scolds.  (What is it with the scolding?).    “You putta da seeds in That size seed cup?  Oooh, too big, too big.  You gotta starta small, so the plant gets a little root bound. Then a they grow strong, you see?  Then a you move them to the bigger seed cup.  You young a people want things too quick, that’s a you problem.”

   This weekend while Mike paid a visit and gathered some tips, Louie gave him a big bunch of dried oregano from last years crop. This Old House smells delicous with the scent of rich oregano.

It’s a Wonder I Ever Survived

…. without his great knowledge and superior wisdom…

Him:  Mom, don’t park back here, it’s not cool. Please move up there next time.
Me:  What’s the difference?  It’s like… 30 feet away from up there.
Him: ( Heavy sigh and eye roll).  Just park up there. Parking here is just stupid.
Me:   I’m sorry, I didn’t see the – Stupid Parking Only –  sign here.
——————————————————————————————-

Him:  MOM!..don’t buy this anymore, I don’t like it.
Me:   Umm.. it was one of the only three things you’d actually eat about two weeks ago??…
Him:   That was two weeks ago, I don’t like it anymore.
Me:  OK then.

——————————————————————————————

Him: Mom, don’t ask him if he needs a ride, he WANTS to walk.
Me:  Well it’s cold out, let me make sure.
Him:  NO MOM, that’s so not cool! He WANTS to walk. Omg.
Me:  It’s cold out, I’m going to ask.
Him: ( A sigh so heavy it could drop Hulk Hogan.)

He didn’t want the ride. 

Him:  I told you.

——————————————————————————————-

Him:  Those sneakers are so dorky. You’re not wearing them, are you?
Me:   I sure am.

and you know what came next.

QUICK!!  Ask your teenagers anything you want to know!!!!
While they still… know…. EVERYTHING

Still My Valentine

 I will never be accused of being overly romantic.  I’m certainly passionate about a lot of things, and I love my husband and children dearly.  I think they know that.  But when it comes to cards dripping with sentiment and grandiose gestures of  unrequited adoration,  it just ain’t me.

 Right here today is where I’m gonna give it a good shot, though.. because everyone deserves to hear it now and then.  The photo below is from our wedding… I call that day the “Commodores Wedding” because we were all  so very SHINY!..  it was the 80’s, you know.

 That was supposed to be my garter… *sigh*
He’s still a wiseguy

   Dear Mike –

 23 years together!  We’ve gotten a lot accomplished with each others support and we’ve raised two pretty awesome kids…the biggest accomplishment in my book.   The going isn’t always easy and life has certainly thrown us some hardballs. Through those toughest of times you have always, ALWAYS.. been my rock.    While our differences sometimes feel like the Great Divide…  I want you to know I’m glad I didn’t buy a ticket  for any other roller coaster…the occasional lurches are definitely worth this ride.

 Happy Valentines Day with Love –

For all you readers out there… I appreciate every single day the time you take to visit  this little blog. It still amazes me that you pay attention to my ramblings.  I love that we all share ideas, creativity, inspirations, rants, sometimes whine..and wine!  We eat, pray and love together…  life is good.

Images  I took  from the internet below… love found in stolen glances…..
I know, now I’m pushing it..

 If only we could all get this one right…

And so it goes…

Text:

CollegeGirl:  MOM I feel awful. Have I ever had strep?

Me:  No, you’ve never had strep. What are your symptoms?

CG:  I ache all over and have a stuffy nose.

Me:  Well if you start to feel alot worse or develop a fever, stop in the nurses station at school and have them check for strep,  ask if the flu is going around campus.

CG: Ok I will.

later….

CG:  I feel really lousy and now I have a fever. I went to the nurse, she doesn’t think I have the flu but she gave me this horrible tasting stuff to take.  It’s #######.  I’m going to bed.

Me:  Want me to come pick you up and you can convalesce at home this weekend?

CG:  Noooo, but thanks. “M” is making me chicken noodle soup from scratch!  And he went to the store and got me “stuff ”  to take. I think I’ll tough it out here, but thanks mom     ( “stuff”  here, when it was described to me later, was a freak’n arsenal  –  Nyquil so she could sleep better, dayquil for when she has to be alert, sore throat lozenges and half the contents of the local CVS too, I’m sure. )    Have I mentioned that “M”, who showed up around Christmas time and had us frantically looking for a present to give someone who’s –coming home for Christmas- that we don’t even know yet –    turns out to be a pretty decent guy by anyone’s standards from what we can tell.   Good thing I didn’t get that light-up reindeer Christmas Sweatshirt after all, huh?

And… I think I lost my day job.

Where… do the years… go.

Old Family Photos… in the Loo?

 Why not? …. who’s rules am I following, anyway…

This downstairs bathroom needed something.

  We still have boxes and boxes in the basement that have not been unpacked since our move. These family photos used to hang in our old dining room and I love them dearly – so why not put them where they will get full attention.  You’re just sitting there, guest or resident…….might as well have something to look at, right?

 Some of you might be disturbed by the random assignment and slight crooked
appearance of  these photos..I don’t read instruction manuals
and I don’t measure before I hang pictures. It’s just how I roll.
 

I don’t always iron curtains when they come out of the dryer, either – although these are getting ironed
because they’re even too wrinkly for me.
That’s the dog sink – their food is underneath and they go IN
when they need a bath. 

 My grandmother Elsie – I still have that wedding dress.

 My Dad, who I resemble… except for the ears.
Mike’s father, who passed away recently.
Handsome, he was.

And this is one of my favorites.  Mike’s dad and his brothers are hanging out on the edge of their
“swimming pool”.  Their father had a fruit and vegetable store and he had lots of crates from
the produce.  This “pool” is made of crates in a circle with a tarp laid over it and filled with water.

 My aunt and uncle, who still kiss like this at 78 and 80 years of age. She made that dress for their engagement party.   They sleep in a full size bed, not even a queen. I asked them why they never got themselves a bigger bed and she said  “I can’t sleep if we’re not touching back to back, cheek to cheek.”    I don’t know if that’s down-right adorable or too much information.
Either way, it makes me smile.